MikelWJ - Shame V. Guilt lyrics

Michael [internal monologue]: I haven't felt this bad in a long time. And the last time I did, it ended with a hospital trip. I know I said I didn't want any help, but doesn't that always mean I actually desperately need someones help? I don't know. Oh well. I guess I'll just have to do my best by myself [Verse One: MikelWJ] I'm feeling lonely tonight, something just doesn't feel right Since I'm the only one with damage at the end of each fight Your words all cut like a knife, and I felt every slice Praying you'd save my life, if I was quiet and nice So now I'm bitter, not sweet, put my head under the sheet Because the only thing I want now is a place I can sleep Eyelids are heavy and wet, wishing that I could forget Since all I aimed to accomplish was simply settle my debt These thoughts will drive me insane, if I don't tell you them plain I've never sugar coated words, and now you always complain I see the anger you feel, ignored me all through our meal And when I asked if I could help, you doubted I was for real You're so sarcastic it's awkward, and now my mood has been altered And I was hoping that you'd notice that my smile was slaughtered Now I'm the chorus and the star of my very own opera Except the genre isn't comedy, it's horror and drama [Chorus: MikelWJ] I tried to grow, but all it did was hold me down You'll never know, if I will always be around This guilty heart, is all that I have now Break it apart, pick the pieces up off the ground [Verse Two: MikelWJ] Gravitations not a reason to be falling in love And I don't want to be the victim of this sinister bug So I'll just pack up my heart, starting the day we depart And I won't use it again, since I don't want to restart Other girls aren't the same, I love your face and your name And I won't settle for anything under that which I claim I know the arguments s**, we're both sarcastic as f** And all we do is run in circles till we're stuck in a rut I say I love you, you laugh, it's like my hearts cut in half So I get spiteful and rude, bringing up sh** from the past You raise your tone as you speak, I scream your yelling at me You give me angry eyes and I say that I think you should leave Leaving me all on my own, writing some stupid new poem Maybe I'll use it as a song someday, or maybe I won't You were my reason to write, these feelings dark as the night But now my pen is out of ink, making me fear for my life [Chorus: MikelWJ] [Verse Three: MikelWJ] I don't want to bring you down, and thanks for sticking around But I'll get worse with every single day I stay in this town I'm stressing more every week, so much I hardly can speak Since people painted me with colors that were faded and weak I feel so jaded this week, Last week my sadness increased And about a month ago I felt my progress had ceased You make me feel like a freak, but then you say it's a joke It's like you stabbed me with a sword but you called it a poke These feelings that you invoke, mixed with a glimmer of hope Feel like a war in my heart, making it harder to cope I'll call you when I'm alone, because I'm just getting home From a place where I never even wanted to go I hope you pick up the phone, I really hope you're awake Since I'm getting more stressed than I think I can take Were the feelings all fake? Tell me how did they fade? Since I'm feeling up till now has been a masquerade [Chorus: MikelWJ] (x2) Michael: I can't do this. I need to talk to her Jacquie: Hello? Michael: Hey, I need to talk to you Jacquie: Then do it tomorrow. I sleepy now. Bye Michael: Damnit. Fine. I'll call her in the morning. I guess it would be good to get some sleep anyway. Where did I put those sleeping pills…