MF DOOM - 808 Man lyrics

{*beatboxing in the background*} Boring... same ol' Sunday type sh** Man, kinda boring Hey you, kid! (Who me?) Yeah you Ahh what are you listenin to in that there Walkman huh? (The new "Gas Face" rewrote'd by K.M.D It's kind of funky with a lot of ba**) Yeah but I bet you wonder where they got the ba** from huh? (I don't really care) Don't care? Well let me you this story Go on now, let him tell you this story [Zev Love X] Friday, I believe it was a payday Onyx, Subroc and myself goes out of subway To catch the X train, the drums roll Brooklyn Plan was a night of intense hookin We enter the club, where we hooked 'til we drop When stopped, to exit, I spoke of this prop Talked about her bouncing guns The word buns was on the tip of my fun swing {"All at once!"} Approached this big fat seven foot.. {"I'll teach you to talk to my girl!"} Said the hood Sub and I geesed, Onyx sped up the block And it was fast, I looked back and Fats was headlockin him I was clockin, about two blocks per minute And then I thought, that voice there's somethin definitely familiar in it Not long did I cram From the lows, I knows it was the 808 Man [Hook] "Thump... thump... THUMP! They heard the.." {Eight-oh-eight} {MAN!} [Zev Love X] Clockin crazy mileage like a 60-deck of math Ducked into an alley like on Kickdrum Ave Stopped and told Sub, but Sub was stumped I said do you recall the ba** that thumped In the Jeeps of the streets, as the pedestrian bops? Heard with vocals where any hip-hop beat drops Y'know the ba** fool! {"And everything happened as it did before"} But Sub wasn't pa**in it To escape hara**ment, I booked like a crook Out of sight, all my mics was took Conscience eatin me, my boy's hooked in Hook Off the 808 Man, so I peeps to look No immediate danger did I see myself in Watchin 'round the block thinkin "Ehh, who's missin him?" Onyx was headlocked and Subroc was half nelson'd Think I was wrappin up? Man, listen [Hook] (Man you guys must have been really scared!) Was I? You think I wasn't?! Man I was petri-scared stiff! (What were you thinkin about?) [Zev Love X] I was thinkin about my cousin Enus, if he asked me once He asked me a dozen times to go bowlin with him But still I wasn't runnin from the Ba**, Man as he walked up Then from the back of my thoughts I forked up The teachings of Mr. Hood And I began to recall when suddenly it dawned on me Lesson one - if a s**er tries to come, let him come By then the hood was up on me Lesson two was to recite the words you can't do me none Even though you might be bluffin, it's nothin Follow procedure and sure 'nough, no doubt Left that seven foot fat hood whupped out Lesson three said a keeper of a hood is his brotherhood As we helped him up he said "Damn! You sure pack a punch, I had a hunch you was a hood Well if you ever need ba**, hook up with the 808 Man" [Hook] Say word Man tried to get me to throw hands, I had to go HU HUH! Yeah check it out yo, yo that's a tight headlock true indeed Yeah, the half nelson got me in a neck brace Yeah, but kid you know where they got the ba** from now? (Yeah yeah, sure do!) Yeah yeah word But I'll tell you what I'll give you this exclusive K.M.D. album tape, unreleased! (Sweet, thanks!) (I'll let my boy Lil' Rock hear it, I'll let Bill hear it) (And my mom and dad will hear it) Yo yo, don't let nobody dub it, don't let nobody dub it Don't let somebody dub it, you'll get funked Now scram, or 808 Man'll do ya Now get up out of here, you thumpty-hump dump head (What?) Yeah yeah, just scram, scram Get out of here (808) {Man} ... (808) {Man}