MC Hawking - b**hslap lyrics

Trash Talk Doomsday, bring the funk Oh, yah. Yo. Ah. Check this sh** out Verse 1 I roll straight pimping to the room of my lecture Prepared to enrapture students with a mixture Of hard-a** science and smooth-a** rhymes So phat you can't fit in my cla** sometimes I'm early. Popping wheelies in the hall Showing off the hydraulics to the hotties' enthrall Of the Hawk. And yo, who can blame them? I only got one thing larger than my brainstem One asks "How big are your rims?" The answer's in my lap, the girl hopped in. I cruised on to my appointed destination Dropped the hottie in the front row, said "Be patient" Now I'm rolling the chair with the ba** turned up See a b**h T.A. got my latte in a cup I'm like "f**! I said Mocha only! I'll smack you so hard your ghost will be lonely" He says "No offense, Dr. H, but your keyboard Challenges your dexterity, and I think more Challenging still would be your rising to the occasion Readying the back of your hand bend on swift administration" Now I'm consumed by rage I say I oughta b**hslap every last T.A. He says "Yeah, you should. Wish you could! But the arms you got don't extend that good." I just smile as if all is forgiven But the glint in my eye be crazy as living On time that's been borrowed that I'll soon collect When I teach a hard lesson in Cause-And-Effect b**h thinks he's only showing off for his peers He's a newbie T.A. who does not know the fear And respect that is due to the Hawk and his crew But he'll learn that and more by the time I'm through He'll get a... Chorus b**hslap (Ow!) Oh, snap Punk motherf**er ain't worth a cap And his S-flap (Ugh!) Proved that No need for the gat Or the baseball bat Just a b**hslap (Ah!) Oh, snap Punk motherf**er ain't worth a cap And his S-flap (Ow!) Proved that How'd I ever get a b**h T.A. like that? b**hslap.. Verse 2 Stayed up late that night, yo, very busy Got shizzy to dizzy-dazzle in the labora-tizzy Servos, motors, chains and gears Mechanisms, the purpose of which is unclear Got all I need, my brain and a screwdriver The Hawk rocks inventing. f** MacGyver! I got in mind, a practical design For a device to help keep T.A.'s in line Next day, all is ready. The punk is oblivious No concept of how doomed he already is Cup in hand, again the wrong flavor I pause as he smirks so as I can savor The moment, then I say "b**h, I said Mocha. Now you get a slapping." T.A. said "No, sir. I don't believe that I'll receive, one of those from you. But if you posit otherwise, let's see what you can do. I was cool, made sure he understood Then hit the bu*ton labeled "Extend that good" With a whizz and a whir, unfolding from the chair Came the robot arm shooting up into the air Wound back with a click, then aimed at the b**h Steel palm, chrome nickel on the backside switch It connected with the T.A.'s head. Velocity hi-yo! Kinetic transfer to his pie-hole His head snapped back, his neck went crack He stood for a moment then his legs went flat My other T.A.'s who'd been brimming when he spoke Got a serious expression on their faces, so I just rolled real slow on up to the lecture The lesson today, the Hawk can wreck your whole sh**, so don't test Or I'll put you on the list to get b**hslapped next Chorus Ah, yah. MC Hawking kicking it with MC Frontalot (Says yep.) Let this be a lesson to all you punk b**hes out there The Hawk can wreck your whole sh**, so don't test. A'ight. We be geese. Peace.