Matt Pless - My Idea of Heaven lyrics

If I were a god, I'd make a lot of milkshakes Pour them down on people, watch them all go crazy If I were a god, I'd fry a lot of bacon Put it in the milkshakes, my idea of heaven Bacon in a milkshake, my idea of heaven If I were a genius, I could make you love me But I'm not a genius cause nobody loves me If I were a genius, I could write equations I could pa** the math test but I never solve them I could pa** the math test but I never solve them If I crack a bottle, I could swallow vodka Walking into brick walls, acting like my father If I crack a bottle, I could swim in whiskey I'd forget my lover cause she doesn't miss me I'd forget my lover cause she doesn't miss me If I were a record, I'd be getting dizzy Spinning 'round in circles, sticking needles in me If I were a record, I'd be wearing vinyl Dressing like a rockstar, going out of style Dressing like a rockstar, going out of style If I were a cellphone, I'd call in a bomb threat Almost got arrested but I shot the sheriff If I were a cellphone, we could learn our lesson I will leave a voicemail if you leave a message I will leave a voicemail if you leave a message If I were a god, I'd fry a lot of bacon Put it in the milkshakes, my idea of heaven If I were a god, I'd find it quite perplexing Balancing the bacon, trying to please the vegans Bringing home the bacon but I love the vegans