Mary Mary, bright and airy You're fairly extraordinary Your cool blue eyes and flaming tresses Always soothe my stresses But I confess on this auspicious day I'm lost for what to say The term "old bag" springs to mind But that might seem unkind, but Over the hill Sounds like a lovely place to be Twilight's alright with me Out to pasture's nicer still Over the hill No more to climb, you're on a roll Unwind your mind and stroll In a field of thyme and sage Smile lines are all the rage All the world's a pa**ing stage We're merely here to play Over the hill, not far away Recessive genes and milkmen were debated We never looked related Like chalk and cheese and odds and sods But we talk like peas in pods Yes, our phone bills show our waxing love Our voices rise above Whatever your dumb white cells do We'll all be here for you... Oh, Mary! We really love you so Oh, Mary! We're here to let you know Oh, Mary! We've come from near and far To let you know how grouse you are Oh, Mary! And no-one's here to gloat Oh, Mary! We're all in the same boat Oh Mary! All paddling afar To let you know how grouse you are... To arrange this party was partly strange Our methods had to change 'Cos Mary's who we tend to ring when planning such a thing And for choosing presents, she's got the gift To give your heart a lift I hope to do the same in song So why not sing along?... It's time to get ecstatic ...For my sister, systematic ...Dramatically emphatic... And in two years I'll have this in mind too, 'cos I'm not that far behind you...