Mads Veslelia - So Low lyrics

[Verse 1: Mads] I'm a tortured soul, I'm just so low I got a bogus smile, I'm not normal I don't find the time, I feel sorrow Easy for yah to judge, but yah just don't Know the real deal, what I'm saying I'm depressed for real, I ain't playing I'm a deep guest, I'm just waiting To check out from this black cloud that I'm staying on All I ever wanted was to play along strong Never thought that I was suicidal, sh** wrong I still remember that day, I was so close, a click from gone, I've been sick so long Oh, I'm not making this up, to fill a song I'm not making hip hop for you to sing along This is real pain, real feelings Real words, I'm hurt and f** it I'll sing it [Hook: Karoline] Oh, I don't wanna live, in this f**ing mean world (Cause everything I've heard is words, that don't mean nothin') All good I've ever seen, is in a f**ing dream world (Cause everything they do is too good to be true) [Verse 2: Mads] Waking up to another f**ing day Police call me say they got something to say They think my mom is dead, from overdose so they Need my approval to break in, ok As I'm sitting there waiting on the message I'm preparing myself on how I'm gon' tell it To my brother, my grandpa, my cousin, and grandma I share a deep depression, this direction is hell I never thought I'd had to be the man in this family Yesterday I was 10, now it's no remedy I've been threatening and beating, sweating and bleeding To prevent the darkness from impeding my feelings I'm at the point where I'm more than low I got dangerous plans that no one knows Every day is a battle inside, my thoughts they grow First k** them all, then give myself the last bullet whole [Hook: Karoline] Oh, I don't wanna live, in this f**ing mean world (Cause everything I've heard is words, that don't mean nothin') All good I've ever seen, is in a f**ing dream world (Cause everything they do is too good to be true) [Verse 3: Mads] Keep pouring evil liquid in my cup I'm not drinking, watch it float over the top Take my life away, I don't give a f** I'm at the edge, singing my last song Ain't planning on stop And guess what, I give up, so what now? I go down One click, and I'll be just another body in the water, floating around And that sounds so peaceful My brain, there is nothing more lethal I got pain, no one can see through Everyday demons tryna defeat you And to top it all off There's no one that calls And even if there was They couldn't help me from those thoughts So I'm thinking about leaving, exit from this overload Forever peace and Just sail away like a swan Every day that I live, is a day that I won But I don't think that I'm gone I make it to the next morning, no warning, be gone by the end of dawn And as I'm looking through my eyes, at my last minute I'm thinking of my life, my past and what I had in it My bad but I'm about to quit it, sh** Tell people I was tired of, this [Hook: Karoline] Oh, I don't wanna live, in this f**ing mean world (Cause everything I've heard is words, that don't mean nothin') All good I've ever seen, is in a f**ing dream world (Cause everything they do is too good to be true)