I've been going t'same pub fer twenty year, It were half a crown then fer buy me beer, But they closed it down fer redecorate, They said we'll knock a wall down, Change bar round, Paint door brown, It's going to look great. When I walked into it I couldn't believe me eyes, Every c*nt had a shirt and tie, Mirrored walls and daft plastic trees, It were a fun pub disco, Wine bar bistro, Gay club puff house, co*ktail carvary. So I walked to the bar fer to get me ale, She said Tetly Bitter's not for sale, They had fizzy lager with a German name, I said you've got to be joking, I started choking, me voice were croaking, I turned round. Then a penguin grabbed me fer to throw me out, He said you've got to dress like a twat end to get in now, But I've been served in here for twenty years, Now it's a fun pub disco, Wine bar bistro, Gay club puff house, co*ktail... Oh what the f** f** f** have they done to me pub, What the f** f** f** have they done to me pub, What the f** f** f** have they done to me pub, Now it's a fun pub disco, Wine bar bistro, Gay club puff house, co*ktail carvery.