Lucille Ball - You're A Liar! (1991 remastered) lyrics

(From the 1961 Broadway play Wildcat) Why you couldn't tell the truth Unless you thought you were lying. What? I'd admit that I'm hardly renowned. For the high type of people I know. But I feel that in you hang around. Is to reach a ridiculous low. If you wanna a skunk I wouldn't mind If you wanna a drunk I wouldn't mind If you open and bit like me like a bit bug In the bunk I wouldn't mind. But you're a liar! You're a liar! And the liar is the lowest kind of wretch. So I'm stretching the truth Does that make me a fake? Am I dreaming out of trash? Just cause I never carry cash? That's a reason to avoid me like a rash. Though I'm stretching the truth You reveal there's a heart Of a heel underneath that hairy pelt. Why would you throw a girl a belt? Then behave as though she actually spelt. If you wanna smelt I wouldn't mind Giving you a belt I wouldn't mind If I'd knew that you would learn the lesson from the welt I wouldn't mind But you're a liar! You're a liar! And you'll be a liar til you're dying day. So you're able to tell If there's oil in the soil From a teeny little whiff, hah. You and your million dollar sniff. Would you know If you were falling off a cliff? So you're able to tell From a glace at a lease. That my chances are absolutely dead. No opportunity except Would you know one If it hit you in the head? Water on the brain I wouldn't mind Any kind of pain I wouldn't mind If you only pushed me Underneath a moving train I wouldn't mind. But you're a liar! I am not! You're a liar! You're a welsher! And I'll thank you not to take me for a chump. You're a lump of conceit. You are cheaper than the cheap. You can jump in the lake. You're a flocking carrot cake. If I died I am poor. You're a frozen little frog. And what's more you're a fink! Will you tell me what's a fink? I don't know! Goes to show how you lie in your teeth. In your hair! In your eye! You're a bleat even that! That's a lie! Is not! Is too! So what! Here's what, we're through! But why? You lie! I do not! Waah!