Louis CK - Half Dead lyrics

*crowd cheer* Thank you, thank you Thank you very much Uh, thank you. Hello, everybody I mean, by everybody I mean, uh, you guys I mean everybody who's here I shouldn't say everybody because most people are not here By a pretty *huge* majority Most people are not here Most people are in China, actually That's true Actually, that's not true. Most people are dead. Did you know that? It's true, out of all the people that ever were Almost all of them are dead There are way more dead people And you're all gonna die And then you're gonna be dead for way longer that you were alive Like that's mostly what you're ever gonna be You're just dead people that didn't die yet There are so many dead people Ray Charles is dead Hitler A bunch of other ones But mostly those two guys That's true, Ray Charles and Hitler are both dead And really, that's the only thing they have in common Because otherwise, they're very diiferent dudes Many contrasts between Ray Charles and Hitler I'll tell you a few of 'em Ray Charles was black. Hitler was not Hitler k**ed several j**s Too many, I'll say too many An accessive amount of Jews He really beat that thing to the ground Just no moderation Ray Charles, meanwhile, hardly any Jews He k**ed so few Jews