Life Of Agony - How It Would Be lyrics

I wonder how it would be if my mother was still around The types of talk The relationships we could have had The three of us Me, you and Dad My mouth went dry My stomach felt queasy too So empty and scared It's all because of you A dead body that turned out not to be dead No one understands Wish I really knew what happened to my mom Because my family they told me nothing but lies They figured if they just told me the truth I'd break down and cry Feel betrayed and hurt Profoundly insecure Want to knock ten times on heaven's door Still suffering from old emotional wounds I was getting worse Can't depend on them and their lies Why did see leave? How did she die? And when it gets colder outside I'll be back next year With that feeling to make me cry Wanna go visit her grave Because it's been a long, long time Want to pick a peach rose And rest it on its side Say a prayer eventhough I don't believe And say goodbye Don't get me wrong I have a mind to keep me strong But there's this feeling of not knowing what went wrong And how she's dead and gone Don't think anyone thinks Of you as much as I do