Lasik - Years lyrics

(Verse 1) Yeah, spitting this villainous villainous feeling inside of mind, laying in bed its almost close to dawn, man it's like my mind is gone, just like in this very song, but I just played a long and pretended I was ok, been a hard couple hard couple of years, at some points I resort to tears, but I gotta face my fears and move on, it's too late to turn back now, not like I could have anyway that i already know, been a hard 4 years, mom and pops got divorced in 11' when I was 7, I remember like it was yesterday, yeah I hate to say but those were better days, now I just gaze to horizon my mind goes off, my life goes to a black screen then I doze off, moms is getting married like sh** really, I feel like a barely even know this guy, I don't hold back my feelings I don't wanna lie, if I wanna say anything bad I'll say it to your face, then I just wake up in this crazy place, like where am I, oh sh** it's 2005, seeing my whole childhood pa** me by, feeling like life's going to fast I don't wanna die, the I just start to cry, I doze off again , then I wake up and I'm standing where it happened to begin, sitting in that hospital waiting for me, screaming like don't ignore me, then It fades out again, then it comes from black, laying on that couch with my moms, i was sick and she stayed a long, maybe if this didn't happen it wouldn't go wrong, now I'm standing to where it all happened, mom crying dad crying on the couch I put one eye open, then I start to feel this certain omen, I lifted up my head and dad said do back to sleep, then I remembered in my head my thoughts start to creep, then my future self I just start to weep, this is too deep for me to handle again, then I fade out to black and then, i wake up in a field all kinds of people around a grave, then I hear people say that was very brave, confused and could bear to see the day, I was sitting in that grave, I just couldn't believe, I saw my two children and my momma I couldn't believe it, thinking in my head oh god help me! I have so much to be grateful for, yeah unnoticed that now but I always wanted more, but I'm so glad I'm still here that's not something to ignore