Lara - Actual Cannibal Dave Strider lyrics

You're walking in the woods There's no one around And your phone is dead Out of the corner of your eye you spot him Dave Strider He's following you About 30 feet back He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint He's gaining on you Dave Strider You're looking for your car But you're all turned around He's almost upon you now And you can see there's blood on his face! My god, there's blood everywhere! Running for your life (From Dave Strider.) He's brandishing a knife (It's Dave Strider.) Lurking in the shadows Hollywood superstar Dave Strider Living in the woods (Dave Strider.) k**ing for sport (Dave Strider.) Eating all the bodies Actual, cannibal Dave Strider Now it's dark and you seem to have lost him But you're hopelessly lost yourself Stranded with a murderer You creep silently through the underbrush A-ha! In the distance A small cottage with a light on Hope! You move stealthily toward it But your leg! AH! It's caught in a bear trap! Gnawing off your leg (Quiet, quiet.) Limping toward the cottage (Quiet, quiet.) Now you're on the doorstep Sitting inside, Dave Strider Sharpening an ax (Dave Strider.) But he doesn't hear you enter (Dave Strider.) You're sneaking up behind him Strangling superstar Dave Strider Fighting for your life with Dave Strider Wrestling a knife from Dave Strider Stab it in his kidney Safe at last from Dave Strider You limp into the dark woods Blood oozing from your stump leg But you have won You have beaten Dave Strider Wait! He isn't dead! Strider Surprise! There's a gun to your head, and d**h in his eyes But you can do Jiu Jitsu Body Slam superstar Dave Strider Legendary fight with Dave Strider Normal Tuesday night for Dave Strider You try to swing an axe at Dave Strider But blood is draining fast from your stump leg He's dodging every swipe, he parries to the left You counter to the right, you catch him in the neck You're chopping off his head now You have just decapitated Dave Strider His head topples to the floor, expressionless You fall to your knees and catch your breath You're finally safe from Dave Strider