[Intro: Jackie Beat] 10... 9... 8... 7... 6... 5... 4, 3, 2, 1, blastoff! [Verse 1: Jackie Beat] It was December 25th, in the year 3000 And my spaceship was orbiting Earth I ate some freeze-dried turkey and a capsule of egg nog To celebrate the savior's birth I decorated the inside of my jet propelled module And broke all of gravity's laws I was feeling really homesick so I looked out the window And I saw Santa Claus! [Interlude: Jackie Beat] Hey, fat stuff! How ya doin'! Hahahaha [Verse 2: Katya] I wore a tight silver jumpsuit with matching boots Everything an astronaut could want And a clear plastic helmet that looked like a bubble Big enough to hold my green bouffant I tuned out mission control and turned the dial 'till I found A station playing music made on Mars It was a holiday treat, but with a Space-Age beat And intergalactic guitars [Interlude: Katya] The moon looks like a giant disco ball! [Chorus: Both] Bossa nova Christmas here in outer space Drinking tang with vodka, toasting the human race Wearing moon mascara and big dipper base It's a bossa nova Christmas here in outer space [Verse 3: Jackie Beat] You can find mistletoe on a mission to Mars And even if you could, imagine this: There is no telephone, so you're just sittin' there alone Feeling alien with no one there to kiss [Verse 4: Katya] And Saturn is so strange, no presents to exchange And the holidays on Neptune are just heinous The food on Jupiter blows, that's why everybody knows The best place for a party is Uran*s [Chorus: Both] Bossa nova Christmas here in outer space Loosen your Van Allen belt and shove some fruitcake in your face Thank Astrud Gilberto when you're sayin' grace It's a bossa nova Christmas here in outer space [Outro: Both Bossa nova Christmas here in outer space Shoot your rocket in my crater, let's cut to the chase Put it in my asteroid and then blastoff on my face Cause it's a bossa nova Christmas here in outer space