[SHYLOCK, spoken] Ladies and Gentlemen, Shylock Productions in a**ociation with Pilgrim Enterprises presents the Bottom Brothers - in their touching life story [TROUPE] Who's that coming out of Cornwall With his brother It's Nick (and Nigel Bottom) Who's that starting out with nothing But each other It's Nick (and Nigel Bottom) [NICK/NIGEL] Yes we are the Bottom Brothers Writing plays just like our mother said we oughta do We've learned a thing or two [BEA] He almost got us all beheaded [NICK, spoken] Sorry! [PORTIA] Instead we just got banished-ed [ALL] Yay!!! [NICK/NIGEL] We came from London on a boat We landed here and went and wrote [NICK/NIGEL/BEA/PORTIA] A play with songs And dancers galore [BEA/PORTIA] It's something no one else has ever seen before [ALL] So here we go, putting on a show [NICK/NIGEL] And not just any old ordinary show [NICK/NIGEL/BEA/PORTIA] A big and bold extraordinary show [ALL] A must see magical new original musical! A musical! There's nothing as amazing as a musical With song and dance and sweet romance And happy ending happening by happenstance And you'll see, it will be only the beginning This glorious creation called a musical [SHYLOCK, spoken] Have you heard the news? Shakespeare's new play opened. They say it's his masterpiece [NICK] What's it called? [NIGEL] Hamlet [NOSTRADAMUS] Hamlet - I was this close [ALL] Welcome to America Where nothing rhymes with America But who's complaining We're living in the new world And living the dream It's our debut Welcome to America Where everything is new! Welcome to America Everything is new Welcome to America [NICK] Land of opportunity!