[Intro - 'Big Worm' talking] Yeah that's cool Er, everything closed so we just We might as well just go straight to the hotel And just get some rest Let me slide this dick up on in ya [Verse 1] [Ice Cube] If I was f**ing you right about now You'd have a dick stuck in you (yeah) Have to go brag to your f**ing crew On how this rap n***a dick you down Tenderized them guts and didn't have to kick you down Who this b**h n***a wit' you now? Do we know about your X-files? And your s** styles? And all the n***as that you think about f**ing And the sh** you know you really wanna do when we buzzin' (hahaha) [K-Mac] If I was f**ing you, sh**, it'd be like drama (yeah) And you might get tripped on by my baby mama (hey mac) So do what I tell you and everything'll be alright You're cute as f**, plus that a** is tight (hype) Get the f** on 'fore these n***as start to fight I can see it in your eyes, you wanna f** tonight Give head and everything, she got a fool in love (fool) Gave it up to me, a gangsta, after the club [Mr. Short Khop] If I was f**ing you, I'd be pakin the piss The horny weight dick gettin' laid is for chips b**h I'm tryina' make grips Him in with the trojan pack 'o six Hin the gin and juice the mix No time to pause, gots to drop draws Prep though a a**-spanking', breakin' down walls With tactics, n***a used two prophylactics (double-up) Hit the twat chopper style Bang it up back (echo) [Hook] If I was f**ing you (echo) (overlapping) ooh, oo, yeah, a, ahh, uhh, uh, come on [Verse 2] [Ice Cube] If I was f**ing you, you'd be like f** everybody Cube, this p**y yours Washin' dishes, rubbin' floors Doin' chores for a n***a Open doors for a n***a Ridin' shotgun, holdin' forty-fours for a n***a At the motelly, got you on your belly In come morcelli n***as calling K-Mac, b**hes calling Kelly Do it like Arthur Fonzarelli, hit the lights So we can try to reform these potential dykes [K-Mac] If I was f**ing you, you'd be spendin' all your dough (yeah) Buying n***a sh**, that you don't even know (mm) Credit card maxed-out Bank account tapped-out Writin' bad cheques (hahaha) When I call you break your neck You do whatever please me, runnin' burs while I take it easy Will as you do whatever, live your life just to please me These buster-a** n***as make the sh** so easy (He was f**ing me?) for sheazy [Mr. Short Khop] If I was f**ing you, I'd let the homies f** too Run up in the guts, bust nuts and we're through Have you fiendin' Cooch screamin, needin' cleanin' Creamin', tag-teamin', s**in' semen Keep it low, put it in your grill cos you love me With video footage of you giving n***a scully (got you) Hold it till you choked off the b**h then got gut And roll one to smoke, grab my sh** and shake my spot [Hook] [Outro] ['Big Worm' talking] Nineteen inches of complicated funk. hahahaha Ango urgin', probably be vomiting dick for a week though s**in' on semen, hahahahahahah... Hmmm... be careful what you wish for, you just might get it