Jus Daze - Comfort of Comforters lyrics

A crippled individual whose gifts are beyond lyrical Can't prohibit physical, thoughts you call me in critical Emotions where your mind state isn't pivotal, it's pitiful That you say I am what you are and I'm the one invincible I wrote this rhyme two in the morning in my car Drunk, all alone, just staring at the stars Unaware of who I was outside the bar Unfamiliar faces where nobody knows who you are But the reason I started writing this rhyme Was 'cause I was going through a kinda difficult time I found myself gaining fame but losing loved ones I feel like nobody knows what it's like becoming "someone" Plus, I kinda wish I had a trust fund 'Cause working check to check makes money add up to none With no HMO and no healthcare I'm too proud to beg or be on welfare, so sponsored links I wonder if I k** myself Would it equal a trip to hell with a clean bill of health? Would anyone even care? Or be sad if I wasn't there? I don't have the balls to ask people so I won't dare I wanna enjoy the comfort of comforters in the summer In an air conditioned room with a beautiful woman lover But I never trusted women as much as I trust my mother And even 100% fully I couldn't trust her I feel like I'm too coward to k** myself And too afraid to ask for help on how to heal myself But I ain't afraid to die and that sh** ain't a lie It's just part of the reason why I continued writing this rhyme at 3:30 'Cause to let go of the hurting Depression leaves, I grieve but it keeps resurfacing I can't front, I'm trying to snap out of it 'Cause for every ounce of happiness I feel a deeper sadness I guess I'm sick and twisted in your eye And tomorrow is full of sorrow and tear filled as I cry And bring a new day in 'Cause I believe in God, but that also means I believe in Satan And he always tries to find a way in If the kitchen is hot, my hand's on the stove flaming Pain is real, that's why the truth hurts What's valuable to me, to others has no worth Like myself, I feel privileged to be on Earth But if I die, I'll feed the planet as I rot under dirt So am I worth more dead or alive? Does it even matter? Should I try to survive? I said I believe in God, so I'm hoping there's a heaven And I ain't f** up too bad so I can get in Maybe I'm forgetting The sun is rising in the East But in the rest of the world it just setting