Jonathan coulton & john roderick - Christmas in Jail lyrics

Old Daddy can't be there for Christmas I'm sure your Momma told you things Well first, she never understood me But I don't want to talk about that now Now, Daddy hates to be away from you at Christmas But don't you worry, I'm doing fine inside I made you a toothpick Eiffel Tower I got three squares and I'm making a kinda wine This punishment is cruel and unusual Well I did my best, but the system said I failed Don't lie awake and wonder whether Santa visits me There's even Christmas in jail Well I had a stack of presents for you, darlin' Though the sheriff took them down to Evidence Now, I don't want to put this burden on you Would you have your mother bring me cigarettes? You know you're always first in my affection With good behavior, I'll be out in two As far as all that money that went missing Well it's not for your mother, it's for you (minus expenses) This punishment is cruel and unusual Well I did my best, but the system said I failed Don't lie awake and wonder whether Santa visits me There's even Christmas in jail Yessir Well the Mess Hall's serving turkey tetrazinni I got my stocking hung up right above the john, yep From my little window, I can see the starlight They're the same old stars that you'll be wishing on This punishment is cruel and unusual Well I did my best, but the system said I failed Don't lie awake and wonder whether Santa visits me There's even Christmas in jail This punishment is cruel and unusual Well I did my best, but the system said I failed Don't lie awake and wonder whether Santa visits me There's even Christmas in jail Don't lie awake and wonder whether Santa visits me There's even Christmas in jail There's even Christmas in jail