John Tartaglia - Story of My Life lyrics

[Guard] Alright, when I call your name, step forward Pinocchio, the puppet [Pinocchio] I'm not a puppet I'm a real boy [Guard] That's your patch of mud down there [Pinocchio] Oh, dumped on a swamp Man I tell you sometimes being a fairytale creature s**s pine sap Life is disappointing Woe is what I know Outed by my nose That's just how it goes For poor Pinocchio Story of my life Always doomed to fail Cheated by a fox Swallowed by a whale That's the story of my life, oh yeah That's the story of my life [Shoemaker's Elf] Strife is never ending [Guard] Peter Pan [Peter Pan] Banished From the town [Guard] Ugly Duckling [Ugly Duckling] They dragged me from the pond [Fairy Godmother] They broke my magic wand [Three Little Pigs] They blew our condos down [Guard] Wicked Witch [Wicked Witch] Life is but a witch hunt [Mama Bear] Mama's in the mud Mama's in distress [Mad Hatter] They ridiculed my hat [Three Little Pigs] They said that we were fat [Big Bad Wolf] They tore my cotton granny dress And called me a hot and tranny mess [Guard] Sugar Plum Fairy [All] Story of my life Booted from the ball Told to go away [Humpty Dumpty] Tumbled off a wall [All] But that's the story of my life [Guard] You're late rabbit [White Rabbit] That's the story of my life [Guard] Have fun you guys [All] That's the story of my life [Guard] And remember If we find you back in the kingdom, you will be executed [All] I always dreamed I'd get a happy ending [Wicked Witch] And this right here, not how it goes [All] I always dreamed I'd get an ever after If this is it, it blows It blows It blows It blows [Pinocchio] This is worse than the time I caught Dutch Elm's disease in Tijuana [All] Story of my life All the wasted prayers All the broken dreams [Three Bears] All the broken chairs [All] All the damage done [Three Bears] All the busted beds [All] All the shattered falls [Three Bears] And the porridge on our heads [All] That's the story of my life, yes sir That's the story of my life, oy vey That's the story of my Life [Pinocchio] Crap