Jeremy Dooley - Red vs Blue: RvB Thowdown lyrics

[Intro] IT'S TIME FOR A ROOSTER TEETH THROWDOWN! LEONARD CHURCH! VS SARGE! RAPPERS READY?! THROW IT DOWN! [Verse 1: Church] It's the fight of the ages! Red vs Blue Or it would be if anybody cared about you By the end of this battle you'll finally see Leader of a real team ain't as easy as it seems to be You're trying to mold three wimps into men I run the suit of the biggest bada** there's been You're shotgun's primed for a war you've been storming up But back away my laser face has started warming up Hate the people on your team and can barely control them Got your a** kicked by freelancers, Sarge while I owned them The Director, a machine you're a cadencing shmuck Can't rap against a ghost so BOO you motherf** My story's what fans and critics adore I'll sum up yours in one word "snore" This is all getting real, b**h, this isn't a game All they call you is Sarge, THAT's NOT EVEN A NAME! [Verse 2: Sarge] You're rap is finally over the fat lady said I'll kick your a** three times with a left, right, left Sarge isn't a name, it's superiority Unlike yours, my team respects enough to bury dead me You got rhymes more fruity than a strawberry Yoo-Hoo I'll rip you so hard your whole team will go "blue-hoo" You say you're a leader? Oh, man that's a riot This sergeant's loading up to kick you straight in the privates Red wins, blue s**s, how it's always ended Wipe this scum from the earth as God intended So d**h to the Blues on the beautiful day Rotting up like roadk** on a lonely highway And one day we'll sit around a tattered blue flag Stepping on the necks of you broken battered dirtbags Nothing you can say can stand up to me So drop, bluetard, and give me infinity [Verse 3: Church] (Ahh!) That's cute look at you, you thinking you're still relevant? Since Reconstruction hit, you're completely insignificant You're an old has-been who's still trying to prove He's just as good as he was back in 1952 (Boom!) Goddamn! I really died for this war?! You're the only one caring about this motherf**ing score If I actually tried, you'd be down in one go Also brown-nose, rust-boat, wide-load, and Delano Red s**s deal with it, and let me just remind you that It's because of me, RvB went past season 3 You stepped up to a game you can't play Church is in session so maybe you should stop and pray [Verse 4: Sarge] Your days are numbered you scruffy nerf herder Got a brain full of beats and a bo*er for murder A case of blue like yours calls for proper medication Got a shotgun full of pills for your insubordination Glory to the red team, and extra glory to me I need a proper victory, so who's in charge of confetti? You're an old computer program with a virus maybe I'll wipe your hard drive clean with the treads of my Chupababy (Ooh!) We're just better, that's not gonna change So take a step closer into face-stabbing range Your fall's a matter of "when", not a matter of "if" My second shell is for you, I'm saving the first for Grif (What?!) [Verse 5: Felix (Locus)] Hahaha! Oh, put away the threats and the knuckle cracks (I told you to stay out of this) Dude, just relax These guys wanna fight, and hey, we're supporting it But now we're chiming in on the rhyme (How unfortunate) See we're just better, in every way What you've done in your life, I've done in a day (We're perfectly crafted, cunning, k**ing machines) The two baddest of the mercenary space marines I'm a supreme know-it-all when it comes to a knife Close-ranged combat's how I'm living my life Then couple me up with an invisible dread (By the time you see me you're already dead) How'd you both get teams following your command? (When you can count your IQ on a single hand?) I can't believe this fake battle's caused this much fuss Cause the way I see it (You're just practice for us) [Verse 6: Church] Calling Epsilon, the Alpha, the Director online RvB is just a tale of my life story designed When I powered Tucker's suit my tale came to an end I know that's hard to explain to a dude with no friends! [Verse 7: Sarge] Friends don't make you smile in this battle-scarred Hell What made me smile was watching you dissolve yourself But you tried your damn best, so don't take it too hard But it's time to s** it blue, you just got Sarge'd!