[Eric Cantona] Ma chère Mademoiselle, it is with deepest pride and greatest pleasure that we welcome you tonight. And now, we invite you to relax. Let us pull up a chair, as the dining room proudly presents... your dinner Be our guest! Be our guest Put our service to the test Tie your napkin 'round your neck, cherie And we'll provide the rest Soup du jour Hot hors d'oeuvres Why, we only live to serve Try the grey stuff, it's delicious Don't believe me? Ask the dishes They can sing, they can dance After all, Miss, this is France And a dinner here is never second best Go on, unfold your menu Take a glance and then you'll Be our guest Oui, our guest Be our guest! Beef ragout Cheese soufflé Pie and pudding, en flambé We'll prepare and serve with flair A culinary cabaret! You're alone And you're scared But the banquet's all prepared No one's gloomy or complaining While the flatware's entertaining We tell jokes! I do tricks With my fellow candlesticks! And it's all in perfect taste That you can bet Come on and lift your gla** You've won your own free pa** To be our guest If you're stressed It's fine dining we suggest Be our guest! Be our guest! Be our guest! Life is so unnerving For a servant who's not serving He's not whole without a soul to wait upon Ah, those good old days when we were useful —Eh, Cogsworth? Suddenly those good old days are gone Too long, we've been rusting Needing so much more than dusting Needing exercise, a chance to use our sk**s Most days, we just lay around the castle Flabby, fat, and lazy You walked in and oops-a-daisy It's a guest! It's a guest! Sake's alive, well I'll be blessed! Wine's been poured and thank the Lord I've had the napkins freshly pressed With dessert, she'll want tea And my dear, that's fine with me While the cups do their soft-shoein' I'll be bubbling, I'll be brewing I'll get warm, piping hot Heaven's sakes! Is that a spot? Clean it up! We want the company impressed! We've got a lot to do Is it one lump or two? For you, our guest! She's our guest!