Willam - The Vagina Song lyrics

I want a real vagina there so frickin' bad I'll buy it Tampax and some maxi pads (I'll take good care of it I promise) It will come with a hymen, all new and pristine But I'll bust that cherry like a s*utty queen (With a big ole dick) Oh every time I close my thighs My balls they fall right out the sides (of my panties) So turn my dick into a slip and slide, I swear The world better prepare for when I'm a lady there Yeah I would have the whole shabang done The surgery is not so fun Put it on your wishlist to give my gash a little kiss I'll probably pull a little Britney and flash it And show the world I paid the coins for the front slit I want to see if it makes sounds when I go piss It's called a p**y maybe 'cause it makes sounds like a cat hiss It'll be a couple months since my ditch was dug Made a hole from a pole, now all I need is jugs (Oooo) I'll probably get real tasteful like, just kidding they'll be huge (right) You won't forget about me stupid Even when I'm old I'm gonna have a big fupa Oh every time I close my eyes (whatcha see, whatcha see) I dream my dick will fall off and die And then I'll get a clit so supersized, you'll stare The world better prepare for when I'm a lady there (Oh oh) when I'm a lady there (oh oh) I'll be buying the panty sets from Frederick's Louboutin for the kick Then I'll ask Victoria what the hell her secret is Toss a couple fingers up inside for the heck of it But keep the thumbs out, don't be thinking I'm a fisting chick Yeah I'll probably let you take a crack at it Love you long time, apocalypse now attack at it Ooo I'll take some pictures for my Christmas card Sit on Santa's lap, get that AARP dick hard And ain't nobody around me Would think that I'm a boy, no one trying to clown me It's just a vaginal scheme, but give me 5's, give me 10's cause it's my dream I want a real vagina there so frickin' bad I'll buy it Tampax and some maxi pads (I'll put sunscreen on it too) It'll come with a hymen, all new and pristine But I'll bust that cherry like a s*utty queen (nice and who*ey) Oh every time I close my thighs My balls they fall right out the side So turn my dick into a slip and slide, I swear The world better prepare for when I'm a lady there (Oh oh) when I'm a lady there (oh oh) Yeah it'll smell like clam chowder there so frickin' bad