[Intro] His hooves in dirt pound And eat up ground He cannot remain bound When the trumpets sound [Verse 1] Let's review some recent facts I make decent cash, I'm a minor star And we can't last if she don't drive a hybrid car I scribble vapid raps on your flyer backs The word is I purchased a refurbished Mac G4 Pull up to critical ma** in a gas-guzzling Ford Just to ask you when next your rock outfit performs Before you tell me the fact, I'm down the road yelling back Please post it on the Whole Foods bulletin board I'd earn a lick of respect in slum art for sure But I threw out my lumbar picking up checks I'm so numb, Lord, yes, despite how I'm blessed I'm destined to end up a slum lord depressed Come by, poorly dressed, your address on the first Hum something under my breath that half resembles some words And like a bird in a suit cut for a brutish bear Back out of there bowing like a Jew in prayer [Hook] I'll never shirk this first world curse A steady hurt and a sturdy purse [Verse 2] A small dark bard, I'll give an inch to start Then leave you home dreaming of the whole nine yards Leave you home dreaming, believing that you'd seen me Loose skin breathing like a cathedral at evening Screaming like a demon in the Garden of Eden Missing what parts that a stork in its beak brings But even what an evil man thinks is really pink And on his insides, doesn't mean you shouldn't pull his card out So what if a man blinks in Morse code while he sings if he sings his heart out? Everybody's gotta get paid I'd say "far out, no way" Frankly, I'd be amazed But a patriot would save the day Make the hitch, help C.I.A What's bad, what's good A complicated man is misunderstood, even to himself Acutely unaware what's in a shallow breath of air And long exhale of something else [Hook] [Verse 3] Two sips, instant drip, Sanka mud New corpus publicist, thanks ya bud As hundred bucks worth of wordy blogger thugs Come forth forthwith to four seasons aflood To morbidly orbit your toilet like hornets abuzz Forming above like buzzards in love When you first wake up, spitting sick from the gut And sh**ting black blood at six Then you wonder why I'm high up, sitting, yup The blundering braggart From a covered wagon spitting under the vagrants in gutters What, does it make me evil? Am I a feeble deranged f**? Cause Jesus would and I would not drive the needle exchange truck? Well if I'm out of luck, I'm still pitching notes through this throat Pissing fears and hopes through the ears of folks listening No matter what, batter up enough of this nonsense You can gather up the contents of the catcher's cup and s** [Verse 4] You kneel and squint your eyes and cup your hands against the window Just to see who rides, to get a glimpse inside the limo Have some self-respect and exercise some tact While I supply the info that you lack One must pay the frat fee to enjoy the fat-free snacks Strippers, roofies, and six-packs, and groupies with big breasts Sending out ma** texts asking who's next To get his lance waxed in the wickedest s** acts Step back from the stretch, mack, and mind the gap With all due respect sir, there's a limited cap You'll need a ticket to kick it in the back Of this rented, tinted-out black Cadillac But I can tell by your polo slacks, Sebagos, and blank stare You're good for the total package and game to be back there But who am I to judge a man's heart by his yacht wear? And it scares me to d**h, yes, that I'm starting to not care [Hook] [Verse 5] Good and evil's often neither strength or flaw But sod in the seed of what you are A filthy silt stashed in a white silk sash Or a doula dove smashed in an airplane crash [Outro] I'll never shirk this first world curse A steady hurt and a sturdy purse A steady hurt and a sturdy purse