Weird Al Yankovic - Squeezebox lyrics

[Intro:???] Oh my god I cannot believe this moment is happening But drag it out Al... [Verse 1: MC Paul Barman] Hot plaything, stop shaving p**y's not the same thing as armpits or legs It carpets the negative space filled with eggs, where you're threadbare "Dead air! Where's the red hair?!" I'd admire a firesnatch, mine's black as a briar patch To a sold out crowd I'll yell out loud: "Stop shaving, stop now!" Drop trou shaving is like going home sober If you have to, make a comb-over Cold pa**ion, so old fashioned Curls got hold traction, I'm askin': "Why do women shave off their beautiful eyebrows and retrace them in pencil? To look like surprised clowns ?" Their once down on the ground on all fours back then shaven cold with clogged pores Look Clean doesn't mean cycle oiled machine Cleaning water with chlorine that of liquified mermaids is like raping babies in Africa to cure your A.I.D.S. and Waging war in an attempt to fight d** is like keeping clean a floor of white rugs because Dirt goes deeper than at first sight You can judge a book by it's cover when the marketing works right Skin color's inelegant to fur stripes Abandon ship! You let your standards slip A natural (whistle) Don't look like no landing strip What used to seem too simple now produces goosepimple [Outro: ????] Alright I gotta stop!(Are you kidding me?) I gotta man, I gotta go Oh my god Al, you don't know The MOST historical thing just happened You playing Madvilliany's Accordion