Walter Martin - Jobs I Had Before I Got Rich & Famous lyrics

[Verse 1] Mowing lawns, saving up for a guitar When I was fifteen and long and lean And just like that gra**, boy, I was green Delivering roses in Washington D.C Going off to college so I had to save up But delivering roses really s**s Sweating all summer in a slimy tux But at least I made a couple bucks [Verse 2] Freshman in college I was delivering pizza But to deliver one pie was a half an hour round trip And college kids, man, they don't tip So I quit and it was their loss ‘Cause I was the only driver not stealing from the boss And siphoning gas from students cars [Verse 3] Metropolitan Museum at the telephone switchboard When a caller would ask for Phillip de Montebello I'd transfer to my apartment where an unsuspecting fellow My roommate Stewart, so sound asleep Would answer the phone when he heard the beep Pretty quick they'd realize that he wasn't Phillip [Verse 4] Information counter at the Cloisters Museum And one day Billy Joel walks in I take a long, long look at him A dignified old music man And that's when I devised my plan [Verse 5] And that little plan has brought me here Where the spotlight shines and the people all cheer And the pretty girls flock from far and near To touch my hand and hear my song And buy my t-shirts and sing along Goddamn, this sure beats mowing lawns