Viarritz - Wishing lyrics

How did you know where to find me I thought I was hiding Thought it was confining I'm out of my mind and you're always beside it The empty space Yeah you override it And I'm getting whited Yeah I'm getting blanked while You're outside of the world, with your fake smile And I just don't know what to do with your take outs Hand me downs and leftover pain now And I'm so confused Dunno what to do You left me alone, battered and bruised But I couldn't blame you No, I couldn't choose You as the fault Man you have no clue What you did Why'd you go and do this I said I didn't care then but you know what the truth is Yeah, you know what the truth is You always knew what the truth was I don't know who you were trying to fool But nobody got it, no one but your tool That twisted L He's one to kiss and tell I don't know what you wished, but I wished you well Yeah, well look how far wishing got me Blank with no paternal property And I wish you could hear these words right now With hopes they'd set that black pipe down And bring you back out of the ground Make it so you were back around Make it so she wasn't an alcoholic And wasn't always bringing herself down You were the key The answer The secret To bringing life back to what we would see fit Instead you lost you and lost all the pieces And now we're left just trying to keep this Life moving forward but I'm taking steps back I'm tryna stay balanced, but I'm falling off track I'm slippin' and tumbling, not staying intact I know you wanted a lot but you wouldn't want that No, you wouldn't want that I know you wouldn't want that You had such big dreams -- ambitions I remember when you thought that I wasn't listening You sit there and you'd list em I just hate to see that you missed em As I sit here and shed a tear Thinkin about our time, year after year How you taught me lessons, more depressing While I'm watching my mom's stressing Knowing that when you were here, it wasn't like this Now I gotta grab a bullet and bite it Grit my teeth through every action that I see her make Wishin you were here to fix everything that you let break But when you dipped, you left more behind than you know You weren't meant to be all on your own You should've forgotten that life -- left it alone Instead you let sleep's cousin give you the bone And I know you're in your own zone now Got a new place to call home now But I just wish one more thing before I go out Please dad, guide me as I grow now