Tom Lehrer - N Apostrophe T lyrics

(Scene: Outside the cave of a very grouchy hermit (H). A very sweet child (C) coming along) (C): Isn't it a lovely day? (H): No, it isn't! (C): Could you come outside and play? (H): No, I couldn't! (C): Did you ever take a hike? (H): No, I didn't! (C): How'd you like to ride my bike? (H): Frankly, I wouldn't! (C): Isn't, couldn't, didn't, wouldn't Is that all you can say? (H): Isn't, couldn't, didn't, wouldn't - Yes, now go away The sweetest sound to me It stands for "not" I like it a lot It's spelled "n"-apostrophe-"t" (C): Have you ever tried to smile? (H): No, I haven't! (C): Won't you try it for a while? (H): No, I won't! (C): Are there games to play in there? (H): No, there aren't! (C): Then why d'you like to stay in there? (H): Frankly, I don't! (C): Haven't, won't, aren't, don't Is that all you can say? (H): Haven't, won't, aren't, don't - And I said: "Go away:" Grouches all agree We get a glow From saying "no" With "n"-apostrophe-"t" (C): Do you talk to anyone? (H): (wistfully) No, I don't! (C): Come on out and have some fun (H): (hesitantly) No, I couldn't! (C): Can't you even tell me why? (H): (apologetically) No, I can't! (C): Will it k** you just to try? (H): (wanting to) Well, I shouldn't . . (C): Don't, couldn't, can't, shouldn't Now, try it once my way (C): Do? (H): Do . . (C): Could? (H): Could… (C): Can? (H): Can . . (C): Should (H): Should! Hey, that feels okay! (C): So come along with me . . (H): I'll give it a try And say goodbye To "n"-apostrophe (C): "N"-apostrophe (C,H):"N"-apostrophe-"t"!