Sleep, little baby, sleep now my love The Milky Way's shining high up above When you grow up, you will learn all that stuff But for now, close your eyes Close your eyes Sleep, little baby, try not to squawk Tomorrow and tomorrow you'll learn how to walk To love and laugh, to make toast and talk But for now, beddy-byes Your blanket's hand-knitted with pure angora wool Your nappy is dry and your tummy is full Of enough antihistamine to chill out a bull Yet still all this gringing What more could you want for? I just cannot guess You constantly complain to me; you should feel blessed There are children in Africa, starving to d**h And you don't hear them whinging What more can I do to put a stop to This mind-numbing noise you are making? Where is the line between patting and hitting? When is rocking "rocking" and when is it "shaking"? I don't know what else I can do to try to hush you My heart says "I love you", but my brain's thinking "f** you" And hoping a child trafficker will abduct you At least then I'll get a few hours in bed I've shushed and I've cooed and I've even try to sing "Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da" in the exact voice of Ringo Now all I have left is to hope that a dingo Will sneak in and rip off your fat b**hing head Hush little baby, don't say a word Papa's gonna buy you a mockingbird In the hope you get avian flu The nice folk in A&E will take care of you That's it, close your eyes, shhh, not a sound I can barely see your tiny belly moving up and down One thing they don't mention in the parenting books: Your love for them grows, the closer to dead they look