Tim Minchin - The Song for Phil Daoust lyrics

This is a song for Phil Daoust: occasional Guardian Newspaper journal-oust. I never ever ever mentioned your name, or the review that you wrote, when I was new to this game. But now the time has come, I think I've dealt with my feelings at last. I really wanna forgive ya Phil, yeah I wanna put the past in the past-a Oh and as this is London Town, I thought I outta take the opportunity. 'Cause there's a pretty good chance somebody out there will know you, Maybe he will pa** on a message for me. Just wanna say, Phil Daoust, occasional Guardian Newspaper journal-oust, That it's been three years since you wrote it, and time is very healing. But I still wanna cut big chunks of flesh out of your stupid face and make your children watch while I force you to eat them. Yeah I wanna make your children watch you eat your own face-meat. Ding Dang Ding Dang Dong, This is my Phil Doust Song, Everybody sing along, La la la la la la la, I hope one of your family' members dies. Phil, Ding Dang Dong. I've written you this special song, to help you get the attention - you obviously, desperately lack. And I know that you're a smart man, and with such a fine mind, I guess it has to be hard- To resist throwing narcissistic, intellectual tantrums in the supermarket isles of your self-regard. Just wanna say, Phil Daoust, I know it must be really hard to be a journal-oust. While a deadlines always looming, and the pressure to be entertaining. So maybe you should quit and get a job that you'd be better at - like k**ing yourself, you f**ing c*nt. Ding Dang Ding Dang Dong, This is my Phil Doust Song, Everybody sing along, Tra la la la la la la, I hope something you love catches on fire. Phil, Ding Dang Dong. I've written you this special song, to show how far I've come along - in my efforts to be more mature in the face of negative feedback. You f**ing poo-face.