Are you frightened by the weight you possess or Is this life just weightlessness And smoggy twilight in LA I can't think of one real thing to say And you and me out walking in the canyons She forgets that we were friends I guess it all depends on your mood Why can't these meds be any damn good And she said Why can't you be Like my waterpik shower ma**ager A sweet reliable machine And to tell the truth I don't feel less alone My water ma**ager's the purest love I've ever known Why can't you be Like when I was thirteen And I said, Why can't you be Like an art house foreign movie Frank and s**y, red balloons and ennui And aloof to me, yeah Why can't you be A little more of a mystery Why can't you be The part of me that's missing Instead of leaving me for some other Say we're perfect for each other And I know we won't spend this life alone She said, Why can't you be Like an outsourced government contract I'm a fat cat gettin' away with anything Kicking some secret special powers Illumination rounds in showers Cause your tearing your hair out While we can have a bed of flowers And I said, Why can't you be Like the chicks out on the road Some girls are happy just to see me 'Cause you got moxie and a broken nose You take 'em away from this prose Sometimes a bl**job's not enough Why can't you play A little less rough Why can't you be The part of me that's missing Instead of leaving me for some other Say we're perfect for each other And I know we won't go spend this life alone Can we Just leave it be We could live Our lives Separately Could you forget What happens to you To you and me When we're dead We'll be dead We'll have eternity And I will spend it all Missing you Missing you and me So while I'm alive I will always be Seeking you out Digging you out Wondering about How it goes so far down and what's wrong with you What's wrong with you and me And she said, Why can't you be Someone lookin' deeper into me Like JD Salinger Why do I challenge her In all these surface ways That you displease Why can't you be A little more at ease Well, Why can't you be Like a hand rolled cigarette I'm not joking This masochistic self-pity of smoking And this city ditty I keep provoking you to leave me And she said, Why can't you be Like a candle I can snuff You're still a diamond in the rough And I swear to God I've had enough How can I call your bluff?