Third Eye Blind - Shipboard Cook lyrics

I wanna go to the ocean And send a postcard of my loneliness Forgetting you is so elusive I run away but it's always this You're the only one I love It's always been you And I wish I was conscripted in the Merchant Marines Shanghaied into service to sails and machines just to stay alive And my sister keeps it simple she’s a shipboard cook She can run line, but if you take a look, it's not easy though 'Cause I'm hoping you will find me I keep hoping you will find me Hoping you will find me I keep hoping you will find me I'm always a ghost I tried your gypsy tarot readings, some seance stunt I keep an open mind but I think it’s just a front Want to believe it though My sister says: "Forget her boy, that's all that you need" She pitches magical elixirs, potions full of mead for a broken heart It's too late for that And I try to keep it simple I try to keep it true It’s always been you It’s always been you When you sailor boys brag about the hearts that they broke It's all just a joke It's all just a boast Yeah yeah yeah, oh I'm always a ghost You're about as haunted as a darkened basement I've got all the chances of a dog in a settlement She may have her secrets, she'll never tell I ride along without 'em on a deep sea swell I heard there's something new, she starts to talk She's the merry widow on the widow's walk And they say: "What do you fear what are you running from?" The only thing I fear is when I go numb And I'm hoping you will find me I keep hoping you will find me Hoping you will find me I keep hoping you will find me Yeah yeah yeah And I try to keep it simple I try to keep it true It’s always been you It’s always been you When you sailor boys brag about the hearts that they broke It's all just a joke It's all just a boast Yeah yeah yeah, oh I’m always a ghost I’m always a ghost I’m always a ghost I’m always a ghost