[Hook] Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Actin' like life is a big commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Actin' like life is a big commercial [Verse 1] Introducing the uncoordinated Bruce Lee- Jarv, retard on tracks, by ThiefofBaghdad from New Zea- Landing on branches like Leo in The Revenant While rappers get branded, I stay contractually hesitant Standing on my own two, dismantle a pansy- thrown through Paneling of fake wood, I'm hotter than rockin' snow suits In July or August, gotta' teach 'em- taught 'em raw sh** Temperature will be goin up Hotter than any dumb hoe with some large tits Grab 'em, ahh, motorboat (brrrr) slap 'em Not the tits, the rappers braggin' about their ma**ive lack of talent Riding on a hover board, elastic ankle slouch pants Smedium shirts and snap backs, doin' the dab dance How much were the shoes that your parents bought you? Haven't worked a day in your life, it's so ironic you're a tool Man, who you trying to impress? Have you not a shred of virtue? Actin' like life is a big commercial [Hook] Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Actin' like life is a big commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Actin' like life is a big commercial [Verse 2] Act now and we'll throw in an extra set for free Call the number on your screen and buy my sh**ty CD Grab your fire suits because this mixtape's fuego Act now and you'll receive a stale everything bagel Taste-testers open up your mouths real wide We've got a little something that we wanna put inside It's great for all occasions, especially college parties Best enjoyed while you're chompin' off your tongue rollin' on Molly Get your glow sticks ready, autotune comin' at ya' Baalooaaloooaalooaalooo Who's your new favorite rapper? Give me all your money, invest in my clothing line Fashion over rapping, in my skirt I'm feeling so divine I made it, thanks to all of the kids who donated I'm poppin bottles, sippin' syrup, gettin' so faded I'm famous- most played on your little sister's playlist My listeners are dumb and they're easily persuaded Man, f** that- You s** and you're only getting worse, dude Thief and I will break down walls, bomb and then burst through Bother and hurt, vomit and purge on your purse, dude You're actin' like life is a big commercial [Hook] Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Everybody rappin' like it's a commercial Actin' like life is a big commercial [Outro] Actin' like life is a big commercial Actin' like life is a big commercial Actin' like life is a big commercial Actin' like life is a big commercial