[Intro: Ludacris] {*dial tone, BEEP*} Hey, this is Luda, okay? Look, I need you to do me a huge, favor Umm, c-can you please take your name, off of your phone? Umm, my-my girl went through my cell phone and uhh, she may be calling you So, so if you can please take your name off of that And And-and just have it as-as a number on the voicemail, okay? You gotta do this for me, huge, quickly! [Hook: Ludacris] So I'm just sittin in this rehab cla** Tryin to get myself unhooked on a** So then my teacher asked me a question Like "Ludacris, are you over there s**ting?" Ha ha, O-M-G, L-O-L, K-I-T Smiley faces, X and O's, L-M-F-A-O My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone [Verse 1: Ludacris] So I'm gettin treated for my s** addiction In a private clinic and I need you to be sensitive 'bout my condition Cause I'm in it to win it and I really don't wanna further disappoint my fans And my teacher's a cougar so I wish she'd lend a helpin hand, a helpin hand Damn! Calm down, B-B-C T-X-T a M-S-G After cla**, come with me And can I get a little bit of T-L-C? She reply, "What the f**? F-Y-I you're gonna flunk S-M-H, it's such a shame You ain't learned a damn thang" [Hook: Ludacris] So I'm just sittin in this rehab cla** Tryin to get myself unhooked on a** So then my teacher asked me a question Like "Ludacris, are you over there s**ting?" Ha ha, O-M-G, L-O-L, K-I-T Smiley faces, X and O's, L-M-F-A-O My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone [Ludacris] {*dial tone*} This is huge, okay? I need you to do this quickly She went through my phone, she might be calling you So just take your name off and have it as a voicemail Do it now! [Verse 2: Ludacris] So I'm sittin at the crib just chillin and I'm mindin my business Got a text with a tongue out from a number I didn't recognize, I replied "Who is this?" Quick back got a hit back Said, "This is Stacy and I been missin you Had to change my number so I went and got a new phone and a new tattoo" - a what? A new tattoo? Wow! Aww yeah, hurry quick Can you send a nasty pic? So I can see right where it is And I promise I won't show my friends (yeah right!) She replied, "Well okay B-T-W, by the way S-M-H, it's such a shame that you ain't learned a damn thang" [Hook: Ludacris] So I'm just sittin in this rehab cla** Tryin to get myself unhooked on a** So then my teacher asked me a question Like "Ludacris, are you over there s**ting?" Ha ha, O-M-G, L-O-L, K-I-T Smiley faces, X and O's, L-M-F-A-O My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone [Ludacris] {*dial tone*} This is huge I need you to take your name off of the voicemail You gotta do it for me NOW, quickly! [Verse 3: Ludacris] So I pull up to the club stuntin in a yellow Lamborghiiiiini Half bent, black tint Five percent make it a little hard to seeeeee me Stepped out, fresh out Headed straight for the do' on into the V.I.P.! Next thing I got a text from a freaky Latina sayin "Is that you I see? Is that you papi?" So I B-B-M'd, abbreviate Yup and before the night gets too late Let me hit you with a little Q&A Can I tap that a**? T-T-A! She replied, "It all depends! It's me plus one, can I bring my friend?" And all I could think was it's such a shame that I ain't learned a damn thang [Hook: Ludacris] So I'm just sittin in this rehab cla** Tryin to get myself unhooked on a** So then my teacher asked me a question Like "Ludacris, are you over there s**ting?" Ha ha, O-M-G, L-O-L, K-I-T Smiley faces, X and O's, L-M-F-A-O My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone My girl went through my cell phone [Outro: Ludacris] {*dial tone*} Look, I told you she's onto us We probably only have about 24 more hours to live I'm fearful for my life, and I think you should be fearful for yours I mean, do you wanna have s** just once more? Just c'mon, just let me get it in the hole one more time Hole in one, quickly It'll be huge, huge, trust me I think we should do it, I mean we're gonna die anyway Why not, you know? Heh, LUDA!