He's a bicycle kid, He's got his Mister T. slippers He's a bicycle kid, he's eleven years old Dog-faced spawn of a working cla** Tory Bicycle kid never does what he's told He's a bicycle kid and he wants to get a crossbow Bicycle kid had a rabbit that died: Evil little f**er put his pet through the window The he ran to his mother and he cried, cried, cried Chorus: So cry like an onion bicycle kid 'Coz I'm gonna get your for the things that you did Cry like an onion bicycle kid You're just another s**er at heart Bicyle kid - extortion in the playground What does he do with all the money he made? Bicyle kid in Kentucky Fried Chicken And the WHAM-BAM-RAMBO machine arcade He's a bicycle kid, and his mother's on Valium He's a bicycle kid, and his dad's on the lump He's a bicycle kid, and his tea's in the micro He's a bicycle kid and he's on the dump Chorus Bicycle kid sh**ting in a greenhouse Bicycle kid down at the aquadrome Bicycle kid in trouble with a policeman Bicycle kid "he's a good boy at home" Bicycle kid grow up and get an Escort ( Ford Escort, that is. Eighties wide-boy motor ) Bicycle kid grow up and get worse Bicycle kid forget to use a condom Bicycle kid! It's evolution in reverse! Chorus . . You're an evil mother f**er . . Fade