The HeeBeeGeeBees - Granma by St Winnalot's Reform School Choir lyrics

Granma, you're ugly It's time the truth were told And your skin's all yellow Because you are so old And your breath and hair smell Like a kitchen sink To put it in a nutshell Granma you stink You send us birthday wishes You always send us luck But if you want to know the truth Granma you s** Grandad, we hate you You're such a prat You like to think that you're still young 'Though you're old and fat You send us boring letters You give us boring toys Can't you go and bore the arse Off some other girls and boys But we like to make you happy We like to see you grin 'Cos you never put your teeth in And you dribble down your chin Daddy, we love you And you once loved us too You made us oh so happy That day at the zoo But someone was behind us (That's right) And watching all the time (Aah) And then they took you off dad 'Cos flashing is a crime And then they took you off dad (Poor thing) 'Cos flashing is a crime (What a shame)