The Bedroom Philosopher - I'm So Postmodern lyrics

I I wear different coloured t-shirts according to my mood. I as a surf life saving consumer hotline. I I don I and locate the vegemite and write my name on everyone. I and heckle at weddings from inside a suitcase. I and teach him how to knit, and call him Adolf Diggler. I play Yahtzee in nightclubs, at three in the afternoon. I via walky talky, while hiding under the bed. I and put on a slide show of other people I and printed it out in wingdings, and gave it back to you. I I and dye it purple, and pour it on the lawn. I then sing my life story to the tune of My Sharona. I I and stand up to poo, at job interviews. I in the middle of August, and haunt golf courses. I and knitted it into a beanie, and threw it off a bridge. I and cut them up into a ransom note and hid it in a thermos. I and build my own shopping trolley, and only buy one nut. I I and stuffed my clothes with eggplant and pretended it was me. I in heiroglyphics on my neighbour I and made a law banning Nuttelex, and then moved to Spain. I put my shirts in the crisper - they I dirty tea towels to the Mormons, and pavlova to crabs. I on a platform of skateboards that I on the cultural significance of party pies. I through a megaphone, in sign language. I on a black & white TV, with the sound down. I push up against the door, then cry myself to sleep. I from the perspective of a possum that Jesus patted once. I soak myself in metho, and tell them that they I as a reading challenge, and clogged up a waterslide. I in my undies rolling in sugar, in the carpark of a rodeo. I and laced a message subliminally telling Shane Porteous to buy a smock