The Arrogant Worms - Particle Board lyrics

Well my baby came at me with a 2x4 So I fought her off with sandpaper It was 60 grit, it was really rough And it made a lot of sawdust But we patched things up with love and glue We went to the church and said "I do" Our honeymoon was at a hardware store Our love's a lot like particle board Particle Board, it ain't got no grain Unless you paint it with a darkwood stain Particle Board, it doesn't take no brains to know that Our love's a lot like particle board Well I heard the train come rolling by With cattle on board, so we decided We should drop everything and hop that train And take a one-way trip to the slaughterhouse Well we stared at the cattle as they took the walk To meet the man who worked the saw We stared at the blood and the guts and the gore It looked an awful lot like particle board Particle Board, it ain't got no grain Unless you paint it with a darkwood stain Particle Board, it doesn't take no brains to know that Our love's a lot like particle board We made love on a flat bed truck She worried about getting splinters in her bu*t I said don't think about those problems when we rut The deck's made of particle board Ahh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Particle board, you could make a dresser Or a shelf or a hutch or an ottoman You could leave it like it is or paint it up It's still gonna be made of particle board Particle board, it's useful stuff It's stronger than glue, it's better than fluff It sounds like a simile and that's enough To say that our love's a lot like particle board Our love's a lot like particle board Our love's a lot like particle board Our love's a lot like particle board Ahh, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Particle Board!