The Arrogant Worms - The Last Saskatchewan Pirate lyrics

Oh, I used to be a farmer and I made a living fine, I had a little stretch of land along the CP line But times were hard and though I tried, the money wasn't there And bankers came and took my land and told me fair is fair I looked for every kind of job, the answer always "no" Hire you now, they'd always laugh, we just let twenty go! The government, they promised me a measly little sum But I've got too much pride to end up just another bum. Then I thought who gives a damn if all the jobs are gone I'm gonna be a PIRATE! on the River Saskatchewan! (arr! arr! arr!) Chorus: Cause it's a heave-ho! hi-ho! Coming down the plains Stealing wheat and barley and all the other grains And it's a ho-hey! hi-hey! Farmers bar your doors When you see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores. Arr! Well you think the locals farmers would know that I'm at large But, just the other day I saw an unprotected barge I snuck up right behind them and they were none the wiser, I rammed their ship, and sank it, and I stole their fertilizer! A bridge outside of Moose Jaw spans a mighty river The farmers pa** in so much fear, their stomachs are a-quiver Because the know that TRACTOR JACK! is waiting in the bay, I'll jump the bridge and knock them cold and sail off with their hay! Chorus Well Mountie Bob he chased me, he was always at my throat He'd follow on the shoreline because he didn't own a boat But cutbacks were a-coming and the Mountie lost his job Now he's sailing with me and we call him Salty Bob. A swingin' sword, and skull n' bones, and pleasant company I never pay my income tax and screw the GST — SCREW IT! Prince Albert down to Saskatoon, I'm the terror of the sea If ya wanna reach the Co-op, boy, you gotta get by me! Chorus Well, pirate life's appealing, but you don't just find it here I've heard that in Alberta, there's a band of buccaneers They roam the Athabasca, from Smith to Fort McKay And you're gonna lose your Stetson if you have to pa** their way Well winter is a-coming and a chill is in the breeze Our pirate days are over once the river starts to freeze I'll be back in springtime, but now I've to go, I hear there's lots of plundering down in New Mexico! Chorus Repeat Chorus Farmers bar your doors when you see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores.