The Adventures of Duane & BrandO - Dragon Warrior lyrics

I'm gonna club you in the teeth with my bamboo stick Dressed in leather with a shield, ancestor of Erdrick On a quest to bring peace to the land that we're living in On a mission to hit the Dragonlord with my fist I've got a pocket full of herbs for when I'm powering up Found Erdrick's Armor near the tree and punched a Wraith in the nuts I learned a couple of magic tricks, you can call me Houdini I saved the Princess like a motherf**er, barely competing And now she's all over my ba**sack like stink on sh** But I got more important things to do, so f** that b**h See you later, King Lorik, thanks for saving my state Sorry I can't stay for dinner, but I'm gonna be late The Dragon Warrior, baby, driving the ladies all crazy Dudes wearing armor to spite me, they are all jealous they ain't me I'm on a mission to k**, I'll punch a b**h in the grill Cut every f**ing finger off until he's begging, I will I'm on my way to the motherf**ing castle With this new sword, gonna be f**ing them up Level 22 Master, f**ing up ba*tards With this steel ring that I found in the trunk And nobody's gonna touch my style So infantile, to think you'll be f**ing with me Gonna drink this forty, yo, throw some bows Kick your a** into the tree b**h please, I'mma punch them sh**s, kick them sh**s Use some Hurtmore on that b**h f** yeah, I'mma wring they neck, put 'em in check Then bust my damn chick With this quarter pounder bro, make her moan Send her a** f**ing home But right now I'mma grab that b**h Hit them sh**s in the back with my fo' fo' I'm going through the cave with a torch in my hand Fighting off these motherf**ers like a man with a plan I found a secret entrance way in the back of the throne The stupid f**ing Axe Knight better leave me alone Or I'mma break his damn legs in three places, for real Take his sh** and hit his f**ing torso with my shield Oh, sh**, I'm being stared at Come here Wizard, now this time I'll fight back, I'll break that Got this sword, you can fall down, cause, b**h, you're whack Never thought my f**ing a**'d make you die like that Oh no, my torch went out, I gotta save my spells Aw, what the hell Radiant, I'm almost out anyway Finally, I found the exit way to this maze And now I'm approaching Dragonlord with some words to say Somebody better dig him a grave, for real (You ready, motherf**er? Well try this on for size, b**h!) Punch to the face, kick to the shins Use some Healmore, now let me begin Yo, I'm deader than sh**, it's only fair to warn 'Til you show your true form Now I'm blocking and kicking, I can't f**ing get it I barely got any spells left I thought I was winning I guess I was forgetting the power of his fire breath As I fall to the ground, I think of the town How in the f** could I let all these nice people down?