[Tabs] All of this hurt then I've been through has turned me into a savage beast I'm tired of all the lies, it's why I walk through life half asleep Try to paint a masterpiece of everlasting peace But alls I see is k**ers pa** the heat and kids who haven't laughed in weeks And since I was a child's height I've been living that wild life Sirens and violence sights, ready to die tonight if the time is right I hope I don't crumble under the weight of the pressure Cuz I've been awaiting salvation but this sh** is taking forever And I've got no patience, court cases and probation That's the reason my inner demons give me a standing ovation That's a a bold statement, now you hear it loud and clear On some clouds, the doubt appear, I walk through them b**hes without a fear It would take me a thousand years to explain what I persevere through They're in my rear-view, but I bring it with me to a city near you Try to find my worth as I search through this foul world But everything is a** backwards like reverse cowgirl The pain is catastrophic so I'm smoking ma**ive chronic Til I drop it to a catatonic shock and I have to vomit I mean for example I got to drink a handle of Captain Just to handle the fact that I've become a rambling has-been All this liquor off the bottom shelf has got to help It's hot as hell, I feel like God himself has locked the cell I will state clearly, the way I'm living is not right So I asked Him for a sign then I came to a stop light [Coal Cash] Sang with the birds in the rain until my pain poisoned the well spring Singing as Heaven fell, if this is Hell it might as well sting Cling to my cell, dwell with self imposed misery To physically rebel, broke out of my shell but is it me I'm visibly a mess, express stress in an outburst Trying to reverse the set up, I should get up off my couch first Without worth I feel I'm cursed to be a piece of sh** Became a beast so I'm hungry enough to eat your kids I need to give more than I can endure And I'm not sure if I'll survive or even rise off the floor It's a war inside, I'm more alive when I'm bleeding Receiving a beating, Im needing to let these demons keep feeding And it's eating my soul, I feel a fleeting control I want to go when you're leaving, but my roads leading below And I know there's no escape when my taste embrace the filthy I'm guilty of this facade I'm praying that God will k** me Or bill me for the damage, can't manage this f**ing migraine I force myself to cry but I'm way too high for my pain Why claim to feel for real when nothing effects me Especially cuz I'm disturbed and my reserves have gone empty And I'm mentally berserk so I revert to an animal Rather sh** where I eat than become a piece of the mechanical Capital corruption, the consumption of the ma**es I'll be laughing silently when society collapses