Sh-K-Boom Records - A Day in Falsettoland/Racquetball lyrics

[WHIZZER, spoken] A day in Falsettoland Dr. Mendel at work [MENDEL] I don't get it I don't understand In the '60s, everyone had heart In the '60s, we were all a part of the same team In the '60s, we had a new world to start Could this– Oh God, don't say it is– Could this be the new world we started? Here I sit, brokenhearted and... [PATIENT, spoken] You go out on the street, and there's all these people asking for a handout. Then you go home, you open your mail, and it's full of people asking for a donation. Then, you turn on the TV, and there's pictures of starving children in Ethiopia [MENDEL, spoken] And how does that make you feel, Diane? [PATIENT, spoken] Caroline [MENDEL, spoken] Caroline? [PATIENT, spoken] Yes, my name is Caroline My God! [MENDEL] I don't get it I've been left behind Half my patients: Yuppie pagans Modeled on the Ronald Reagans Now the world is too pathetic And I don't get it at all [PATIENT, spoken] Now that I got the promotion, can I finally stop sleeping with my boss? [MENDEL, spoken] Time's up! [PATIENT, spoken] You always do this! (The patient exits.) [MENDEL] At least there's Trina at home Trina in bed Trina obsessing And sort of caressing My head with her feet I once thought it was sweet But I don't anymore Now I just snore 'Cause I'm so exhausted Listening to these yuppie farts complain Listening as their shallow hearts explain Their lives [CHARLOTTE, spoken] Trina works it out (Trina enters, stretching, and dressed for a work out.) [TRINA] Marvin's back with Whizzer Just like how it was If I don't like Whizzer It's because my ex Sure does Why should that upset me? Sometimes I'm a lout Mendel serenades, and Jason calms me Why should I be wilting When their precious love Is not in doubt? Work it out! [JASON, spoken] The neighbors relax after work (Cordelia enters with food. Charlotte enters their home.) [CORDELIA] How was your day at the hospital? [CHARLOTTE] Unbelievable What is that smell? [CORDELIA] Nouvelle bar mitzvah cuisine I've been practicing Cuisine, bar mitzvah nouvelle (Cordelia hands Charlotte some food. Mendel joins Trina, now also dressed to work out.) [MENDEL, spoken] Hi, honey [CORDELIA] Well...? [TRINA] Hi, honey [MENDEL] How was your day? [TRINA] It was terrible Did you hear that Marvin's back with Whizzer? Marvin's back with Whizzer! [MENDEL] Drop it, sweetheart Give it up You know I love you What's the matter Trina darling? I don't get it Why can't you let go? [TRINA] Maybe in a mile, I'll be ok I'll be happy when we finally have this bar mitzvah [MENDEL] Isn't it enough I want you every night [TRINA, spoken] Who? [MENDEL] Every other night? [TRINA, spoken] Me? [MENDEL] Every third night? [TRINA] Hm... [MENDEL, spoken] Ok, let's drop it (sung) Everything will be alright [TRINA] Everything will be alright [MENDEL & TRINA] Everything will be alright (Cordelia has just poured Charlotte a martini.) [CORDELIA] How was your day At the hospital? [CHARLOTTE] It was wonderful For the first time in months Nobody died [CORDELIA] Yay! [CHARLOTTE] There were just Heart attacks and gallstones; Light bulbs up the a**; Fake appendicitis which was gas Which I diagnosed; People overdosed and I saved them I saved young people, old people One priest, and one high school principal Saving lives, I feel invincible Yes I do Do you know how great my life is? Do you know how great my life is? Saving lives and loving you [CORDELIA] You save lives and I save chicken fat I can't f**ing deal with that! [CHARLOTTE] Do you know how great my life is? [CORDELIA] Yes, I know how great your life is [CHARLOTTE] Do you know how great my life is? [CORDELIA] Yes, I know how great your life is? [CHARLOTTE] Do you know how great my life is? [CORDELIA] Yes, I know how great your life is? [CHARLOTTE] Saving lives [BOTH] And loving you [MENDEL & TRINA] Everything will be alright Everything will be alright Everything will be alright (Marvin and Whizzer enter, dressed for Racquetball and holding racquets. Whizzer is all in white, looking great. Marvin is in baggy and colorful jams, looking baggy. No ball is used; rather, when they make a shot, the racquet scrapes the floor and sounds like a ball ricocheting off a racquet. Their scene is played in the court. In the course of the scene, Whizzer decimates Marvin, as you would expect.) [WHIZZER] Ha It bounced twice [MARVIN] No, it didn't [WHIZZER] Yeah, once, then twice You know it did [MARVIN] That's not nice [WHIZZER] No, it isn't But you're a pain in the a** [MARVIN] You're a beast But, at least When you play me, you win [WHIZZER] You give up [MARVIN] I perspire [WHIZZER] Where's the heat? Where's the fire? Used to be you desired A fight! So fight! [MARVIN] So play! (Whizzer doesn't move an inch; he's in total control. Marvin is k**ing himself trying to get his racquet on the ball.) [WHIZZER] One-two-three-four! [MARVIN] One-two-three-four! [WHIZZER] One-two-three-four! [MARVIN] One-two-three-four! [WHIZZER] One-two-three-four! [MARVIN] One-two-three-four! [WHIZZER] One-two-three-four! [MARVIN] One-two-three-four! (Finally, by mistake, Marvin hits a good shot.) [WHIZZER] Lucky dink! [MARVIN] I'm finessing [WHIZZER] Something stinks in how you play [MARVIN] Don't you think it's a blessing I'm so pathetically bad? [WHIZZER] Just stay back Serve with force I'll attack And, of course I will win Just give in To bliss And kiss... [MARVIN] Let's go! Do you know? All I want Is you Anything you do Is all right Yes, it's all right Do you know? All I want is... You [WHIZZER] Down the alley High lob Low drive Ceiling shot Into the corner Four walls Dink [WHIZZER, spoken] What? [MARVIN, spoken] What? [WHIZZER] Hit your shoe [MARVIN] No, it didn't [WHIZZER] Yes it did The game is through [MARVIN] That's not nice [WHIZZER] No, it isn't [MARVIN] God, you're a pain in the a** [WHIZZER] Play it raw Don't play pretty Sex and games In New York City Have got to be played with flair And pa**ion And pa**ion and flair [MARVIN & WHIZZER] Do you know All I want is you Anything you do Is alright Yes it's alright [CHARLOTTE & CORDELIA] Do you know how great my life is? Do you know how great my life is? Everything will be alright! Everything will be alright! [MARVIN, WHIZZER, MENDEL, TRINA, CHARLOTTE, CORDELIA (dispersedly)] Everything will be alright! Everything will Everything will Feel alright for the rest of your life! Feel alright for the rest of your life! Feel alright for the rest of your life! Feel alright for the rest of your life! Feel alright Feel alright Feel alright for the rest of your life! Feel alright for the rest of your life! Feel alright for the rest of your Rest of Your Everything will be alright!