Roger Miller - The Day I Jumped From Uncle Harveyâ??s Plane lyrics

Me 'n' Oliver 'n' Virgil was in the d**tore k**ing time When my eyes fell upon this magazine And I got to reading this article on sky-diving and parachuting And it said jumping out of air-planes was the thing Now being raised down on a farm and always ready for adventure I knew that I could figure out a way I said "Well Delmer Gill's got a parachute and Uncle Harvey's got an air-plane" So I said "Call the boys together, today's the day" Well I found out too late what Uncle Harvey called an air-plane Was nothing but an engine and a wing And I could feel my fear a-rising as Delmer packed the parachute 'Cos he kept telling me I was doing the right thing Ron Mcloughlin shook my hand as jd strapped me in the harness And Tildon brought a jug and pa**ed it around I took one look at that parachute and that whisky and that air-plane And I turned that bottle up and drank it down Well I was drunker'n Cooter Jones when they poured me in the plane The engine coughed and headed for the clouds But I was sober as a judge by the time they opened up the door And I've never known my heart to beat so loud I said, "Harvey, I can't do it" as he kicked me out the door And I wrapped my hands around the landing gear And I was holding on real good 'til Harvey stepped down on my fingers And Virgil said he heard me scream from way down there Well I thanked God and Delmer Gill when my parachute finally opened I said "Well, hell there ain't no use in being afraid" And I went crashing through the hen house, scattering chickens and breaking eggs And I kissed the ground and fainted dead away Now friends I've done some fighting, and I've been shot at once or twice And I've durn near been run over by a train But I don't think I remember being any more afraid Than the day I jumped from Uncle Harvey's plane