Robert Lopez & Jeff Marx - What Do You Do With a B.A. in English? / It s**s to Be Me lyrics

Princeton What do you do with a B.A. in English? What is my life going to be? 4 years of college And plenty of knowledge Have earned me this useless degree! I can't pay the bills yet 'Cause I have no sk**s yet The world is a big scary place! But somehow I can't shake The feeling I might make A difference to the human race! Kate Morning Brian! Brian Hi, Kate Monster Kate How's life? Brian Disappointing Kate What's the matter? Brian The catering company laid me off Kate Oh, I'm sorry Brian Me too! I mean, look at me! I'm 10 years out of college And I always thought... Kate What? Brian No it sounds stupid Kate Oh c'mon! Brian When I was little I thought I would be Kate What? Brian A big comedian on late-night TV! Kate Oh Brian But now I'm 32 and as you can see I'm not Kate Nope Brian Oh well Kate Mm mm Brian It s**s to be me! Kate Noo... Brian It s**s to be me! Kate No! Brian It s**s to be broke, and unemployed, and turning 33! It s**s to be me! Kate You think your life s**s? Brian I think so Kate Your problems aren't so bad I'm kinda pretty And pretty damn smart Brian You are Kate Thanks I like romantic things like music and art And as you know I have a gigantic heart So why don't I have a boyfriend? fu*k! It s**s to be me! Brian Me too! Kate It s**s to be me! Brian It s**s to be me! It s**s to be Brian Kate And Kate Brian To not have a job Kate To not have a date Both It s**s to be me! Rod/Nicky arguing Brian Hey Rod, Nicky, can you settle something for us. Do you have a second? Rod Oh, certainly Kate Whose life s**s more, Brian's or mine? Rod and Nicky OURS! Rod We live together Nicky We're close as people can get Rod We've been the best of buddies Nicky Ever since the day we met Rod So he knows lots of ways to make me really upset!! Oh! Every day is an aggravation Nicky C'mon that's an exaggeration Rod You leave your clothes out You put your feet on my chair Nicky Oh yea? You do such an*l things like ironing your underwear! Rod You make that very small apartment we share, a hell! Nicky So do you, that's why I'm in hell too! Rod It s**s to be me! Nicky No it s**s to be me! Kate It s**s to be me! Brian It s**s to be me! All Is there anybody here it doesn't s** to be? It s**s to be me! Interlude Christmas Eve Why you all so happy? Nicky 'Cause our lives s**! Christmas Eve Your lives s**? I hearing you correctly? Ha! I coming to this country for opportunities Try to work in Korean deli But I am Japanese! But with hard work I earned two master's degrees! In social work And now I a therapist! But I have no clients! And I have an unemployed fiancé And we have lots of bills to pay! It s** to be me! It s** to be me! I say it s**a, s**a, s**a, s**a s**a, s**a, s**a, s**a, s**a s**a, s**a, s**a, s**! It s** to be me! Princeton Uh excuse me Sorry to bother you, but I'm looking for a place to live Christmas Eve Why you looking all the way out here? Princeton Well, I started in Avenue A But so far everything's out of my price range But this neighborhood looks a lot cheaper Oh and look, a "For rent" sign! Brian You need to talk to the superintendent Let me get him Princeton Great! Thanks! Brian YO GARY!! Gary Coleman I'm coming! I'm coming! Princeton Oh my God it's Gary Coleman! Gary Coleman Yes I am! I'm Gary Coleman From TVs "Different Strokes" I made a lot of money That got stolen by my folks! Now I'm broke, and I'm the bu*t of everyone's jokes! But I'm here, the superintendent On Avenue Q! All It s**s to be you! Kate You win! All It s**s to be you! Brian I feel better now! Gary Coleman Try having people stopping you to ask you "Whatch-you talkin' 'bout, Willis?" It gets old All It s**s to be you! On Avenue Q!! s**s to be me! On Avenue Q! s**s to be you! On Avenue Q! s**s to be us But not when we're together! We're together here on Avenue Q! We live on Avenue Q! Our friends do too Till our dreams come true! We live on Avenue Q! Princeton This is real life! All We live on Avenue Q! Nicky You're gonna love it! All We live on Avenue Q! Gary Coleman Here's your keys! All Welcome to Avenue Q!