I'm sorry for that time I had an idea I'm sorry for that time I told a joke I didn't mean to step all over your ego It's my fault that my heart broke I'm glad I got to meet your brand new girlfriend All I have to say is "wow" I can't believe you met a match so perfect You must feel like a big man now 'Cause your new girlfriend's like a pair of beige curtains Not good, not bad, just there I couldn't pick her out of lineup 'Cause she's as special as air Your new girlfriend is linoleum tile Not hot, not not, just grey Your only silent, malleable furniture I wish I was that way I'm sorry for that time I had an opinion I'm sorry for that time I had a goal I don't want to detract from your powerful presence By admitting that I have a soul It must be nice to feel so smart and superior It must be good to know that she won't leave And she won't notice when you f** other people At least that's what she'll let you believe 'Cause your new girlfriend's like a pair of beige curtains Not good, not bad, just there I couldn't pick her out of lineup 'Cause she's as special as air Your new girlfriend is linoleum tile Not hot, not not, just grey Your own giggly undemanding seat filler I wish I was that way If I was like her maybe I would have The ultimate prize that is you Just dampen my essence and learn to want nothing And all my dreams could come true 'Cause who needs me when I have you? And your new girlfriend's like a pair of beige curtains Not good, not bad, just there I couldn't pick her out of lineup 'Cause she's as special as air Your new girlfriend is linoleum tile Not hot, not not, just grey Your own pointless dumpy little blow-up doll I wish I was that way I wish I was that way