Richard F. Burton - Arabian Nights, Vol. 4 (Chap. 5) lyrics

Ma'an Son Of Zaidah And The Badawi. Now Ma'an bin Záidah went forth one day to the chase with his company, and they came upon a herd of gazelles; so they separated in pursuit and Ma'an was left alone to chase one of them. When he had made prize of it he alighted and slaughtered it; and as he was thus engaged, he espied a person[FN#136] coming forth out of the desert on an a**. So he remounted and riding up to the new- comer, saluted him and asked him, "Whence comest thou?" Quoth he, "I come from the land of Kuzá'ah, where we have had a two years' dearth; but this year it was a season of plenty and I sowed early cucumbers.[FN#137] They came up before their time, so I gathered what seemed the best of them and set out to carry them to the Emir Ma'an bin Zaidah, because of his well-known beneficence and notorious munificence." Asked Ma'an, "How much dost thou hope to get of him?"; and the Badawi answered, "A thousand dinars." Quoth the Emir, "What if he say this is too much?" Said the Badawi, "Then I will ask five hundred dinars." "And if he say, too much?" "Then three hundred!" "And if he say yet, too much?" "Then two hundred!" "And if he say yet, too much?" "Then one hundred!" "And if he say yet, too much?" "Then, fifty!" "And if he say yet, too much?" "Then thirty!" "And if he say still, too much?" asked Ma'an bin Zaidah. Answered the Badawi, "I will make my a** set his four feet in his Honour's home[FN#138] and return to my people, disappointed and empty- handed." So Ma'an laughed at him and urged his steed till he came up with his suite and returned to his place, when he said to his chamberlain, "An there come to thee a man with cucumbers and riding on an a** admit him to me." Presently up came the Badawi and was admitted to Ma'an's presence; but knew not the Emir for the man he had met in the desert, by reason of the gravity and majesty of his semblance and the multitude of his eunuchs and attendants, for he was seated on his chair of state with his officers ranged in lines before him and on either side. So he saluted him and Ma'an said to him "What bringeth thee, O brother of the Arabs?" Answered the Badawi, "I hoped in the Emir, and have brought him curly cucumbers out of season." Asked Ma'an, "And how much dost thou expect of us?" "A thousand dinars," answered the Badawi. "This is far too much," quoth Ma'an. Quoth he, "Five hundred." "Too much!" "Then three hundred." "Too much!" "Two hundred." "Too much!" "One hundred." "Too much!" "Fifty." "Too much!" At last the Badawi came down to thirty dinars; but Ma'an still replied, "Too much!" So the Badawi cried, "By Allah, the man who met me in the desert brought me bad luck! But I will not go lower than thirty dinars." The Emir laughed and said nothing; whereupon the wild Arab knew that it was he whom he had met and said, "O my lord, except thou bring the thirty dinars, see ye, there is the a** tied ready at the door and here sits Ma'an, his honour, at home." So Ma'an laughed, till he fell on his back; and, calling his steward, said to him, "Give him a thousand dinars and five hundred and three hundred and two hundred and one hundred and fifty and thirty; and leave the a** tied up where he is." So the Arab to his amazement, received two thousand one hundred and eighty dinars, and Allah have mercy on them both and on all generous men! And I have also heard, O auspicious King, a tale of Footnotes: [ FN#136] Arab. "Shakes" before noticed. [ FN#137] Arab. "Kussá'á"=the curling cucumber: the vegetable is of the cheapest and the poorer cla**es eat it as "kitchen" with bread. [ FN#138] Arab. "Haram-hu," a double entendre. Here the Barlawi means his Harem the inviolate part of the house; but afterwards he makes it mean the presence of His Honour.