Ray Wylie Hubbard - Choctaw Bingo lyrics

Strap them kids in Give 'em a little bit of vodka in a cherry coke We're going to Oklahoma to the family reunion for the first time in years It's up at uncle Slayton's cause he's getting on in years You know he no longer travels but he's still pretty spry He's not much on talking and he's just too mean to die And they'll be comin' down from Kansas And from west Arkansas It'll be one great big old party like you never saw Uncle Slayton's got his Texan pride Back in the thickets with his Asian bride He's got a Airstream trailer and a Holstein cow He still makes whiskey 'cause he still knows how He plats that Choctaw bingo every Friday night You know he had to leave Texas but he won't say why He owns a quarter section up by Lake Eufala Caught a great big ol' blue cat on a driftin' jug line Sells his hardwood timber to the shipping mill Cooks that crystal meth because the shine don't sell He cooks that crystal meth because the shine don't sell You know he likes his money he don't mind the smell My cousin Roscoe Slayton's oldest boy from his second marriage up in Illinois He was raised in East St. Louis by his momma's people Where they do things different Thought he'd just come on down He was going to Dallas Texas in a semi truck called from that big McDonald's You know the one they built up on that great big ol' bridge Across the Will Rogers Turnpike Took the Big Cabin exit stopped and bought a couple of cartons of cigarettes At that Indian Smoke Shop with the big neon smoke rings In the Cherokee Nation hit Muskogee late that night Somebody ran a stoplight at the Shawnee Bypa** Roscoe tried to miss 'em but he didn't quite Bob and Mae come up from little town Way down by lake Texoma where he coaches football They were two A champions now for two years running But he says they won't be this year no they won't be this year And he stopped off in Tushka at that "Pop's Knife and Gun" place Bought a SKS rifle and a couple a full cases of that steel core ammo With the berdan primers from some East bloc nation that no longer needs 'em And a Desert Eagle that's one great big ol' pistol I mean .50 caliber made by bada** Hebrews And some surplus tracers for that old BAR of Slayton's Soon as it gets dark we're gonna have us a time We're gonna have us a time Ruth Ann and Lynn come down from Baxter Springs That's one hell raisin' town way up in Southeastern Kansas Got a biker bar next to the lingerie store That's got them Rolling Stones lips up there where everyone can see 'em And they burn all night you know they burn all night you know they burn all night Ruth Ann and Lynn they wear them cut off britches and those skinny little halters And they're second cousins to me Man I don't care I want to get between 'em With a great big ol' hard on like a old bois d' arc fence post You could hang a pipe rail gait from Do some twisted sisters 'til the cows come home And we'd be havin' us a time Uncle Slayton's got his Texan pride Back in the thickets with his Asian bride He's cut that corner pasture into acre lots' He sells 'em owner financed Strictly to them that's got no kind of credit 'Cause he knows they're slackers When they miss that payment Then he takes it back He plays that Choctaw Bingo every Friday night Drinks that Johnny Walker at that Club 69 We're gonna strap them kids in give 'em a little bit o' Benadryl And a cherry coke we're goin' to Oklahoma Gonna have us a time