Rapture - About God, About Me lyrics

I was forced into confusion forced into disillusion lost control of my Christian ways whether to remain unsaved or to make that decision God loves me no matter what or so they say Past is the Past and the Present is now why wait to take my Christian vows the reason I do not is not known by me or anyone who does know hasn't told me I I think more and more and I believe its all mental not physical or spiritual My faith is not so strong I believe in the Trinity, Is that wrong? My final decision is that I believe that God died for my sins and I want to be baptised but I'm afraid If I am baptised it will be for all the wrong reason's I love God, God loves me I just can't believe in me