"You don't know me at all" she said I thought that she was messing with my head Of course I know her. Christ almighty! I've known her since 1990 But then she starts telling me stuff I don't know Like she's got a secret lover and an extra toe Swear on the ground below her and the sky above her Never knew about the toes and the secret lover Six toes and a secret lover You might think you know about the women in your life Mother, sister, girlfriend, daughter, wife Never mind that receptionist at work With the funny haircut and the worrying smirk You might think that you know 'em and you might be wrong Maybe the signs were there all along Phone on silent, feet undercover Six toes and a secret lover! Six toes and a secret lover So if you've got a darling, check her toes Regularly in case another one grows Talk to her, get into her mind Otherwise you never know what you might find Extra appendages, unusual habits Top hats containing rabbits There's always one thing or another Like six toes and a secret lover Six toes and a secret lover