Paul Heaton - The Perfect Couple lyrics

The perfect couple with arms entwined Was no position that we could find The perfect meal they wined and dined Background music so refined Their perfect house and household pets Mine just howled, whilst yours just slept When they sang "Walk on with hope in your heart" How come we were stood on the pier When that funny looking bloke sang "Heal the world" I don't think he really meant here When that group sang "Time is on my side" My battery clock just stopped But when that bald guy sang "You s**y thing" Both of our pants just dropped Yes when that bald guy sang "You s**y thing" Both of our pants just dropped The perfect groom, the perfect bride The photo album that glows inside The perfect flowers on mantelpiece His perfect suit, his perfect crease Her perfect dress, her perfect size Out clothes ripped up whilst flower dies When that 60's group sang "Keep on running" When we were just about to wed And when that fella said "Take a walk on the wild side" We were picniking at Beachy Head When that band released "Fool on the hill" Do you think they meant me or meant you When the band sang "Didn't I blow your mind" We must have s**ed as hard as we blew But when the King sang "Always on my mind" It was mine that was always on you We were skiing in the alps, the avalanche had started The volcano had started to spew When that Christian bloke and his backing band Sang "Move it", but not you two When you took me to eat at the local steak house And the band played "Born to be wild" And the woman sang "Running up that hill" When I was heavy with child The pirates tied our hands behind our backs The sea didn't make a sound When halfway down the plank that rap band Started singing "Jump around" Jump around, jump around Jump around, jump around