Noah Cicero - ​transmissions from noah x to tao x lyrics

introduction These are the transmissions of Noah X to Tao X. Tao X did not write back because an hour before Noah X started writing these transmissions Tao X's submarine, The Big Vegan Fat Titty, sunk to the bottom of the ocean. Tao X is currently at the bottom of the ocean writing in long hand his responses to transmissions he never got. one Dear Tao X, I saw a show on Black Holes yesterday. The show said that Black Holes swallow galaxies. I'm very scared. Do you know of any Black Holes near by? I feel, in my left nut, that a Black Hole is lodged in my girlfriend's cervix. So I jammed a shot gun up there and screamed, “Get out you Black Hole, I k** you!” two Dear Tao X, Someone stole my favorite pair of socks. They were blue with kitties on them. My mother sent me a letter, it said, “Noah X, for a 1000 dollars will you marry the Bishop's daughter. She is a good woman. She knows how to cook spaghetti and can out drink a Hell's Angel.” So I married her the Bishop's daughter. She is ugly with moles and saggy b**bs. b**b! Saggy b**b! I knew this dancer, she had big saggy titties, she would bounce them off of men's heads. Oh. How many pain k**ers, do you think, it would take to k** me? three Dear Tao X, Will you send me a picture of your a** so I have something to jack off to? You're a good man. Bend over in it. If you could, send a video, with you spanking it. I want to hear the slaps. Spank your own a** and say, “Eloi, Eloi Lama sabachthani.” Dear Tao X, I went to the used book store today. The man told me, “Youngstown is illiterate.” I did not care. Why care? Do you care if Youngstown is literate? Do they really need to read? I have had over twenty jobs; I not once needed the ability to read. I bought a Saul Bellow book. It is small. I'm scared of it. five Dear Tao X, I'm moving to Kansas. I'm going to get a cornfield. But I'm going to burn all the corn. I'm going to grow alpaca. They are strange animals. I'm going to ride them around and shoot beer cans with a pellet gun while drinking Mexican Beer. Listen, don't tell anyone this. This is very personal. No one knows I'm running to Kansas to start an alpaca farm. The government has restrictions and laws concerning alpacas that I don't feel like abiding by. So please, use discretion on this subject. six Dear Tao X, That book you wanted. A small child riding a pink bicycle stole it last night. There was a raid on the village, over seventy hamsters died in the attack. You have not sent that picture yet? Where is it? I've been slowly pumping my co*k since I thought of it. I can't wait any longer. Please do not send any bombs in the mail like you did last time. seven Dear Tao X, Your cousin Ming has died. He k**ed himself. He went to Africa and screamed at a lion until it ate him. He wrote a note; it said, “Please bury me with a box of Cheerios. Because besides Cheerios everything else s**ed about life.” We honored his last request. At his funeral there was a great band; they played Rolling Stones songs. eight Dear Tao X, It is hot here. I'm sweating badly. My chest hair is moist. My nuts sweat. My nuts smell. I'm sending you a picture of my sweaty nuts. Please look at them and tell me what you think? nine Dear Tao X, My dog died. The dog walked into the house, sat on the floor and said, “This is it, you a**holes.” Then it died. ten Dear Tao X, The alpaca are drunk. We need to die, quickly. The government has taken my alpaca. f**ing Bush! I'm going to break the alpaca out. They need to be free, like birds; or like alpaca. Tonight my left nut swelled to an enormous size. I showed it to my sister. My sister said, “This reminds me of when we were twelve.” My sister gave birth to my son Knut Hamsterstein last July. The child is already dead; Knut stuck its finger in a light socket while my sister and I were drunk. The government didn't press charges. eleven Dear Tao X, I've gotten word your submarine has sunk to the bottom of the ocean. That a giant octopus has invaded your submarine and is eating your brain. You were a really nice guy. That really s**s that happened to you. Can I have your iPod? It is really cool. And your Richard Yates short story collection, I want that too. Can I have those? Please. Gotta take a sh**. See you in hell, Noah X