Whodini: Before we go any further Friends MF DOOM and Whodini: As you call 'em, they call you when they need something Trees for the blunt, the G's for the front I found a way to get peace of mind for years And left the hell alone, turn a deaf ear to the cellular phone Send me a letter or better, we could see each other in real life Just so you could feel me like a steel knife At least so you could see the white of they eyes Bright with surprise, once they finish spitting lies Asssociates, is your boys, your girls, b**hes, n***as, homies Close, but really don't know me Mom, dad, comrade, peeps, brothers, sisters, duns, dunnies Some come around when they need some money Others make us laugh like the Sunday funnies Fam be around whether you paid or bummy You could either ignore this advice or take it from me Be too nice and people take you for a dummy So nowadays he ain't so friendly Actually he woulda even made a worthy enemy Read the signs, "No feeding the baboon" Seein' as how they got ya back bleeding from the stab wounds Y'all know the dance, they smile in ya face, y'all know the glance Try to put 'em on, they blow the chance Never let your so-called mans know your plans (How many of us have them?) A show of hands (Friends) is a term some people use loosely I'm real choosy on what I choose to let crews see You telling me, I try to act broke Jealousy the number one k**er among black folk Fellas be under some type of spell like crack smoke Ghetto Cinderellas, lead 'em right to your stack, loc Just another way a chick'll lead to your end I check the dictionary for the meaning of friend It said, "Person, one who likes to socialize with Sympathiser, helper" and that's about the size of it Most of the time these attributes is one-sided To bolster the crime, they're apt to shoot you through your eyelid And they can't hide it, going wild like a white b**h Sometimes you need to cut n***as off like a light switch (Click) And when things get quiet Catch 'em like a thief in the night, what a riot I first met Mr. Fantastik at a arms deal Don't let it get drastic, think of how your moms'll feel When it get for real, steel get to sparkin' Everything darken and ain't no talkin' For somethin so cheap it sure buys a lot of trouble Ya better off focusing than tryin' to plot to bubble Or else it'd be a sad note to end on, the guns we got is (One's we can depend on friends) Some come in the form of codependence A lot of times only end up being codefendants Ten bucks say they tell for a lower sentence And leave you up under the jail, begging for a penance It don't make no sense, what happened to the loyalty? Honor amongst crooks, trust amongst royalty I'd rather go out in a blaze, than give 'em the glory (How many of us have) a similar story? (Friends) before lovers, we used to have some type of over-standing Just so when I let her get the man thing, she know its no strings We could do the damn thing, but ho it's no rings Just how the tramp swings, will she see 'em again? That depends on how good was the skins and could she memorize the lessons? It ain't no need to pretend Even though she let 'em stab it, she know they just (friends) Whodini: Friends How many of us have them? Friends Ones we can depend on, friends How many of us have them? Friends Before we go any further Fellas, don't be silly I know who my friends are And the next nice neighborhood I move into, you guys'll get crackin' (Negro humor always escaped me) The most powerful, the most mysterious monarch in all the world Guided by a fighting force than never sleeps, that never relaxes its vigilance For none is as feared, none has as many foes as DOOM, the awesome ironclad lord of Mr. Fantastic and Invisible Woman: I know who Doom is (Then tell us) He happens to be the most dangerous man in the world I'd hope we'd never hear from him I'd hope we'd never battle him But now the worst has happened and I must tell you what we're up against Mr. Fantastic: I first met DOOM years ago When he wanted to be alone, alone to pursue his forbidden experiments One day while conducting a secret experiment Later, when he recovered from his injuries Instead of having learned his lesson, DOOM was bitter, angry, vengeful DOOM: What have I done to myself? My face, it is hideous Mr. Fantastic: He traveled the world, seeking a cure for his disfigured face (I'm sorry sir, there is nothing we can do for you) He traveled through remote villages, where strangers are seldom seen He continued his search, never showing his face unless threatened by bandits who prey on travelers Who foolishly wander alone through their domain